06-19-2004, 10:34 PM
I want to have whole areas of property fenced off when I am around. I want to have an organization of people following me around, doing statistical analysis of my every move. I want to see my name on every periodical, I don't care what it is, it can be Bassmasters Annual Bass Masters issue.
I want whole television programs, devoted to me.
I want flowers, gardinias, lillies, and blue roses. And I want a bag of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Cowabungas, and I don't care that they stopped making it 10 years ago, there's got to be a store somewhere in the south shore of Staten Island that is still selling expired foods like Pac-man Chef Boyardee and Ecto Cooler.
I want to have a cell phone, that has the ringtone of the singing performance I just gave, and I want to give out the number to all my fans in the audience, just so that I can hear my song over and over again.
I want a compound on the south end of New Jersey, and I want Kevin Costner around with a large old dog, to protect me when men in ski masks come and kill my sister.
I want to do a cover of a Dolly Parton song. I'd like to give "9 to 5" the props it deserves. And then I'll do a cover of a song from a Jerry Bruckheimer movie by a third rate pop singer.
I want to sit and eat donoughts all day long during the winter, so that I can burn it off during my summer tour, and not have to stop to eat.
I will pay 18 year old high school girls 2000 dollars an hour so that they can lick my pussy while I watch episodes of What's Happening, and the Elvis Comeback Special.
I want a slice of pizza from Joe and Pat's on Victory Boulevard, and I don't care that I'm in London, I want it on my night table at 5am when I stumble back into my room after a night of freebasing in the back seat of a Lincoln Towncar.
I want a house built so that I can say that I live there for the cover of Architectural Digest.
When I walk into a building, I want former Navy SEALs ready at my command to seek out intel on any suspicious humans within a 500 yard radius of myself, and I want 10 select members of my crew to be carrying various stuff animals, and they must be be of a jungle theme, and they must all be plush. I would like to stand at the center of this small group, where I am driving a Lark, and drinking a bottle of tropical fruit Vitamin Water.
I want a room that is totally sound proofed, as well as total private access to the pool.
I want one motel room for each of my crew members, and then one motel room each for my stuffed animals. I then want the hotel staff to ensure that the real live counterpart of each of the stuffed animals is placed in their correspoding rooms, so that when I awake in the morning from a night long session of playing Fight Night and smoking 2 ounces of weed, I can open each one of the doors, and exclaim "THEYRE MULTIPYING!" and close it in dramatic fashion. I would like to do this ten times , so be sure that the animals are found.
I then would like you to take the animals out to the back, where I will be sitting in my limo smoking a blunt while wearing a pink coat, and have take out each animal SS style, shooting into the back of each animals head, with the monkey going last. I want animal blood to squirt all over in front of my car. I then want to get in and drive in front of PETA headquarters, and scream "LOOK WHAT THE BASTARDS DID!"
I would also like a Jell-o pudding pack.
I want whole television programs, devoted to me.
I want flowers, gardinias, lillies, and blue roses. And I want a bag of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Cowabungas, and I don't care that they stopped making it 10 years ago, there's got to be a store somewhere in the south shore of Staten Island that is still selling expired foods like Pac-man Chef Boyardee and Ecto Cooler.
I want to have a cell phone, that has the ringtone of the singing performance I just gave, and I want to give out the number to all my fans in the audience, just so that I can hear my song over and over again.
I want a compound on the south end of New Jersey, and I want Kevin Costner around with a large old dog, to protect me when men in ski masks come and kill my sister.
I want to do a cover of a Dolly Parton song. I'd like to give "9 to 5" the props it deserves. And then I'll do a cover of a song from a Jerry Bruckheimer movie by a third rate pop singer.
I want to sit and eat donoughts all day long during the winter, so that I can burn it off during my summer tour, and not have to stop to eat.
I will pay 18 year old high school girls 2000 dollars an hour so that they can lick my pussy while I watch episodes of What's Happening, and the Elvis Comeback Special.
I want a slice of pizza from Joe and Pat's on Victory Boulevard, and I don't care that I'm in London, I want it on my night table at 5am when I stumble back into my room after a night of freebasing in the back seat of a Lincoln Towncar.
I want a house built so that I can say that I live there for the cover of Architectural Digest.
When I walk into a building, I want former Navy SEALs ready at my command to seek out intel on any suspicious humans within a 500 yard radius of myself, and I want 10 select members of my crew to be carrying various stuff animals, and they must be be of a jungle theme, and they must all be plush. I would like to stand at the center of this small group, where I am driving a Lark, and drinking a bottle of tropical fruit Vitamin Water.
I want a room that is totally sound proofed, as well as total private access to the pool.
I want one motel room for each of my crew members, and then one motel room each for my stuffed animals. I then want the hotel staff to ensure that the real live counterpart of each of the stuffed animals is placed in their correspoding rooms, so that when I awake in the morning from a night long session of playing Fight Night and smoking 2 ounces of weed, I can open each one of the doors, and exclaim "THEYRE MULTIPYING!" and close it in dramatic fashion. I would like to do this ten times , so be sure that the animals are found.
I then would like you to take the animals out to the back, where I will be sitting in my limo smoking a blunt while wearing a pink coat, and have take out each animal SS style, shooting into the back of each animals head, with the monkey going last. I want animal blood to squirt all over in front of my car. I then want to get in and drive in front of PETA headquarters, and scream "LOOK WHAT THE BASTARDS DID!"
I would also like a Jell-o pudding pack.
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