Singles ads - Write 'em for other members

Arthur Dent · 04-09-2002, 01:23 PM

So, here's the gag. Write singles ads for other board members. Short and simple.

Adventurous, outgoing female with well-known breasts seeks male with own ski-mask and chloroform for late night reindezvous.
Contact RP at %!^!£%^@a-hole-l.com

:Someone's busy. Every time I drop in this morning, something on the board changes!:

Maynard · 04-09-2002, 03:56 PM

I can't bear to see another one of Dents threads go unanswered. So....

Skanky whore looking for man to defile her ever orafice. Likes bukakke, scat, and being violated with rusty pipes. Side effects may include, but are not limited to: vomiting, HIV, genital warts, crabs, rectal itching and or bleeding, and a possible case of mild skin flaking. Known to frequent gay midget bars.

If interested, e-mail: [email]<a href="mailto:[email protected]">mailto:[email protected]</a>.[/email]

Hey Ladi · 04-09-2002, 04:05 PM

Sensitive, caring SWM, seeks same for long walks in the park, hand holding & long bike rides. Call me when can shave each others' legs, and download obscure music. 1-973-MAY-NARD

Keyser Soze · 04-09-2002, 04:07 PM

Sensitive stoner in touch with his feminine side, not afraid to cry after listening to Alanis seeks affected college boy to go to concerts and poetry readings with. Must be a good listener and able to deal with spontaneous conversations regarding what I had for lunch. Anime bears need not apply. Caveat emptor, I catch.

Meet me in any thread on this board, they're all about me.

Arpikarhu · 04-09-2002, 04:10 PM

SWM looking for a special friend. you need to like harry potter movies, happy meals, and helping me with my english homework. ladies with a late curfew preferred. contact me at <a href="mailto:[email protected]">mailto:[email protected]</a>. if my mom answers , just leave a message

Keyser Soze · 04-09-2002, 04:19 PM

Introverted sociopath seeks single pasty white female who shares an obsession with television and cinema. Must be able to hold one sided conversations with self unless the forum for conversation happens to be a chatroom, message board or online jeopardy game lobby. Inferiority complex and fear of daylight are a plus. Meet me in the previously viewed movies section at blockbuster at midnite if interested. I'm the one in the Travis Bickle trenchcoat.

Ken'sPen · 04-09-2002, 04:20 PM

Man looking for hot chik, I romantik and fun, enjoy long moonlite strolls on short peerz, monster truck rallys, drinking beer, and small shiny objects, if interested call LZMF1
be HOT!

Maynard · 04-09-2002, 04:24 PM

Quote:Man looking for hot chik, I romantik and fun, enjoy long moonlite strolls on short peerz, monster truck rallys, drinking beer, and small shiny objects, if interested call LZMF1
be HOT!

That was just terrible Ken. You are soooo not teh funney.

Ken'sPen · 04-09-2002, 04:25 PM

fuck off!
you too Arpi!

Edited By Ken'sPen on April 09 2002 at 12:28

Arpikarhu · 04-09-2002, 04:26 PM

i have to agree with maymay. very weak ken. you can do much better if you just apply yourself.

Luna · 04-09-2002, 04:30 PM

Rigidly, opinionated SWM seeks any hot chick that can provide plenty of debate
and argument to make me feel alive in this world. Please send photo...I'll send you mine.
Lawyer chicks are a plus.

Call 1-900-Keyser {:p}

Edited By LunaBabe on April 09 2002 at 12:33

Weird NJ · 04-09-2002, 04:32 PM

LICK ME! LICK ME! YOU WILL DIE! YOU WILL NEVER GET THE NECRONOMICON!! LICK ME!!
Contact me at AIM - WNEW's Girl

NaughtyAngel · 04-09-2002, 04:33 PM

:crackhead:
thanks weird nj i love you too
unless danked just forgot to sign on under his name again

Danked · 04-09-2002, 04:35 PM

damn IT!

Edited By Danked on April 09 2002 at 12:36

Arpikarhu · 04-09-2002, 04:35 PM

i hate to say this but keyser is very good at this

NaughtyAngel · 04-09-2002, 04:37 PM

gee danked how did i know it was you
:fu:
:fuckoff:
:burnfucker:
i :fart: in your general direction

Danked · 04-09-2002, 04:40 PM

Gay, white male seeks salad tosser. Interests must include beastiality, felching, and smokin' a bone. No, seriously.. I'm available.

Weird NJ · 04-09-2002, 04:42 PM

Ha. I knew it.

JIMMYSNUKA · 04-09-2002, 04:44 PM

SWF with sour milk dripping from my skank tank. Looking for anyone at all...dead or alive to sodomize me. I enjoy being one with nature thats why i dont mind if we involve furry creatures in sex. Eating me out is required but you must provide your own HAZMAT suit.

Inquireies go to <a href="mailto:[email protected]">mailto:[email protected]</a>

LZMF1 · 04-09-2002, 04:53 PM

SGWM seeks SGBM. must be hung like a mule and uncut. must also enjoy Hungry Man tv dinners and corn dogs. lower IQ is a must. please contact: [email protected]