The Monty Python Thread

[Hey Ladi]

Mother
Ah, how I hate wearing these beards.

Brian
Why aren't women allowed to go to stonings, mum?

Mother
It's written, that's why.

Beard and stone seller
Pssst! Beard, madam?

Woman carrying donkey
Oh, look, I haven't got the time to go to no stonings. He's not
well again.

Donkey
Oink! Oink!

Beard and stone seller
Stone, sir?

Mother
No, they've got a lot there, lying around on the ground.

Beard and stone seller
Oh, not like these, sir. Look at this! Feel the quality of that,
that's craftmanship, sir.

Mother
Hmm...all right, we'll have two with points and...a big flat one.

Brian
Could I have a flat one, mum?

Mother
Ssch!

Brian
Sorry! Dad!

Mother
Ehm...all right, two points, ahm...two flats and a packet of
gravel.

Beard and stone seller
Packet of gravel. Should be a good one this afternoon.

Mother
Hm?

Beard and stone seller
Local boy.

Mother
Oh, good.

Beard and stone seller
Enjoy yourselves!