Howard Stern's First Show On Sirius

[Keyser Soze]

1. I cheated on my wife and she caught me. - Scott the Engineer
2. I once hid in a bathroom closet and pleasured myself as my family members went to the bathroom. - Sal the Stockbroker.
3. In the last year I got a girl pregnant and had to pay for her abortion. - Richard Christy
4. I think I'm addicted to porn, I jerk off twice a day and prefer to masturbate, rather than having real sex. - Jason Kaplan
5. I have spent well over $10,000 on internet porn. - JD Harmeyer
6. My buddy and I once ordered massage girls but they ripped us off and left us staring at each other in our underwear. - Gary Dell'Abate
7. I have pleasured myself with meat and vegetables. - Robin Quivers
8. I have a half sister I have never met and don't want to. - Fred Norris
9. I've had cosmetic surgery. - Howard Stern
10. A guy once blew his load on my chest. - Artie Lange
11. I once had my stomach pumped for alcohol poisoning and when I woke up, an acquaintance of the same sex was fondling me. - Benjy Bronk

Bonus Revelations...

* I once called a black guy the N-word to his face and he beat me so bad I needed 6 stitches. - Gary Dell'Abate
* A girl I liked was mean to me at a club so I bought her a drink, jerked off in it, gave it to her and she drank it. - Sal the Stockbroker
* I met a girl at a bachelorette party, had sex with the girl and the girl turned out to be the bachelorette who got married 2 days later. - Artie Lange