Singles ads - Write 'em for other members

[Keyser Soze]

WOMEN'S ADS

40-ish: 49

Adventurer: Slept with all your friends

Athletic: No breasts

Average: looking Has a face like a basset hound

Beautiful: Pathological liar

Contagious Smile: Does a lot of Ecstasy

Educated: Banged her Political Science professor

Emotionally Secure: Medicated

Feminist: Fat ballbuster

Free Spirit: Junkie

Friendship first: Trying to live down reputation as a whore

Fun: Annoying

Gentle: Comatose

Good Listener: Borderline Autistic

New-Age: All body hair, all the time

Old-fashioned: Lights out, missionary position only

Open-minded: Desperate

Outgoing: Loud and Embarrassing

Passionate: Sloppy drunk

Poet: Depressive Schizophrenic

Professional: Certified Bitch

Redhead: Bad dye-job

Reubenesque: Grossly Fat

Romantic: Looks better by candle light

Social: Has been passed around like an hors d'oeuvres tray

Voluptuous: Very Fat

Weight proportion w/ height: Hugely Fat - as tall as you are wide

Wants Soulmate: Stalker

Widow: Drove first husband to shoot himself

Young at heart: Old bat



Edited By Keyser Soze on April 12 2002 at 3:44