Dating websites - Would you or have you used one.

Arthur Dent · 03-08-2002, 04:56 PM

Just thinking about those Match.com commercials and how they are really advertising "Hey, good looking normal people here!"

So, the question is, would you or have you ever used a dating website?

Personally, I've always considered them a bit pathetic, but are they any worse than going to a bar and drinking every night? I mean, how many good people are you going to meet in a bar?
(I'm talking about relationships, not one-night stands.)

GonzoStyle · 03-08-2002, 04:58 PM

I tried OA.com a few times, does that count?

Keyser Soze · 03-08-2002, 05:00 PM

I think the bar scene is underrated. If you go with friends and your friends bring other friends, which seems to happen all the time in my group, you meet new people and it often leads to other things. The best way to meet people is in a comfortable enviorment among mutual friends. I think it would be creepy meeting someone randomly over a service like that and uncomfortable.

EDIT: and it doesn't have to be a bar, my friends have a pretty eclectic taste in things to do on any given evening. going to a bar night after night can get to be boring.

Edited By Keyser Soze on Mar. 08 2002 at 12:01

GonzoStyle · 03-08-2002, 05:01 PM

Keyser Soze Wrote:I think the bar scene is underrated. If you go with friends and your friends bring other friends, which seems to happen all the time in my group, you meet new people and it often leads to other things. The best way to meet people is in a comfortable enviorment among mutual friends. I think it would be creepy meeting someone randomly over a service like that and uncomfortable.

Can I hang with you? Can I chill with you? Can I roll with you?

Arthur Dent · 03-08-2002, 05:07 PM

Yeah keyser, that was great when I was in college, but now all my friends are involved in relationships and do "couple stuff". We only get together once or twice a month and it's not an opportunity to meet new people. So, I almost always end up going out alone on the weekends.

Keyser Soze · 03-08-2002, 05:09 PM

Arthur Dent Wrote:Yeah keyser, that was great when I was in college, but now all my friends are involved in relationships and do "couple stuff". We only get together once or twice a month and it's not an opportunity to meet new people. So, I almost always end up going out alone on the weekends.

That sucks man, i've been out of college for almost 3 years now and fortunately even friends from way back when I was 15-16 (EDIT: Shit I just realized, make that 10-12) are still around. I've been fortunate enough to have good friends who have stuck by for a long long time.

I don't just hang with those longtime friends either, i've made lots more along the way, you gotta get out there and socialize.

Edited By Keyser Soze on Mar. 08 2002 at 12:12

Maynard · 03-08-2002, 05:12 PM

Arthur Dent Wrote:Yeah keyser, that was great when I was in college, but now all my friends are involved in relationships and do "couple stuff". We only get together once or twice a month and it's not an opportunity to meet new people. So, I almost always end up going out alone on the weekends.

I actually have that same problem. Well, that and the fact that I don't keep alot of friends. Most people get sick of me pretty quickly. I also make horrible first impressions on people. I either come off as IkeaBoy(the guy who sits in the corner and talks to no one) or as Alkey (the boisterous overconfident guy who thinks he's the God's gift to the world). Personally there's nothing wrong with either one, however, the quiet guy usually has alot more going on under the surface. I've met alot of you, and you know from meeting me, that I tend to ignore you when I first meet you (and some of you I just ignore period but thats a different story), but once you get to know me, there's a bit more too me.

So anyhow, to answer your question, yeah. I signed up on match.com awhile ago, and got a bunch of responses, but never replied to any of them. Why? Well, I guess I didn't really see what I was looking for.

PollyannaFlower46 · 03-08-2002, 05:42 PM

I personally would never use one not because I think it's pathetic, but because I would always worry about the people I would be encountering. I'm sure there are a lot of normal people out there, but there are probably way more freakazoids. A friend of mine uses Match.com, she gets lots of responses, but once she hangs out with them once nothing happens from it. I guess another thing I have against the dating services are that the people are actually looking for love....I kinda feel that love isn't something you should look for, it should just happen.

Arthur Dent · 03-08-2002, 05:46 PM

Did you put a photo with your ad? Did the women who replied send a photo or a link to their ad with a photo? What was the quality?

Just REALLY curios. Won't try it until I get back to the states at the end of April.

For the record, British women are very friendly and easy to have a conversation with over a few pints, but just as hard as NY women to get any further with.

Not sure what's worse, getting the cold shoulder, or having a great night talking with an attractive woman to find out there's no real interest there. I think I just keep finding the good girls who don't do short, passionate affairs with foreigners. :clueless:

Edit:

Quote:I guess another thing I have against the dating services are that the people are actually looking for love....I kinda feel that love isn't something you should look for, it should just happen.

Some of the best advise I ever got about dating was to expect nothing. Just sit back and see what happens. Doing go into a first date with any expectations other than to have fun.

Edited By Arthur Dent on Mar. 08 2002 at 5:49

Maynard · 03-08-2002, 05:50 PM

I've gotten all kinds of different responses. Pictures, no pictures, attractive, not so attractive. All different kinds. Just remember, there's someone out there looking for YOU, you just have to find them. Maybe they're in a bar, maybe they're on a dating service, maybe they're in church. Whatever. Just keep looking and don't get too discouraged.

Hey Ladi · 03-08-2002, 05:53 PM

Arthur Dent Wrote:Not sure what's worse, getting the cold shoulder, or having a great night talking with an attractive woman to find out there's no real interest there.

I'd prefer to know upfront. :thumbs-up:

Two people at work used online services.
One is getting married soon.
The other thought the guy was absolutely perfect for her, and the fates had meant them to meet, (but he was recently divorced and not in the frame of mind for that, so they broke up.)
Oh wait there was a third, she went out with a guy, but he was too short, and kind of needy. (oh well)

I guess it's all about what you go into it looking for. You have to get a LOT of responses, and keep trying. Good luck if you do it :thumbs-up: Will we all be invited to the wedding? :lol:

PollyannaFlower46 · 03-08-2002, 05:54 PM

Quote:Some of the best advise I ever got about dating was to expect nothing. Just sit back and see what happens. Doing go into a first date with any expectations other than to have fun.

I just think that people on dating services have different expectations. I know that my friend when she meets the guys she's been talking to always expects it to turn into a relationship because she thinks that is what they were looking for, and she is always let down.

Rape Fantasizer · 03-08-2002, 06:32 PM

PollyannaFlower46 Wrote:I'm sure there are a lot of normal people out there, but there are probably way more freakazoids.

It's funny you say that, but you were alright to go out to an oa.com function and meet everyone. They could have been just as freaky, you didn't know any of them from a hole in your head. Maybe it's different cause it was a large group instead of one on one, but it was still meeting someone off the internet. I don't see anything wrong with the dating sites, if you are the type of person that wants to date like that.

I've never put an ad up like that, but I have gone to the sites late at night when I can't sleep. Not with any intention of replying, just to laugh at the people. But I have actually seen quite a few attractive people on them.

GonzoStyle · 03-08-2002, 06:41 PM

Hi my name is Gonzo, I like to kick the fucking shit out of people who say they like long walks on the beach. I'm a libra according to keyser.... who wants this?

Ok who's replying.. send all e-mails to [email protected] pictures are a plus, naked ones even better.

Edited By GonzoStyle on Mar. 08 2002 at 1:51

PollyannaFlower46 · 03-08-2002, 06:50 PM

Quote:It's funny you say that, but you were alright to go out to an oa.com function and meet everyone

I brought a friend with me the first night I went out and met people...and I didn't go out looking for something more. I don't have an issue with meeting people off the internet either, my main reason for not ever doing that is the fact that I want love to come when I least expect it...I'm a sap like that.

Rape Fantasizer · 03-08-2002, 06:52 PM

PollyannaFlower46 Wrote:my main reason for not ever doing that is the fact that I want love to come when I least expect it...I'm a sap like that.

I totally agree with you there, love should just happen, not be forced. But if you're just going out with the person from the ad, or your own ad, it doesn't have to be for love.

lent · 03-09-2002, 03:09 AM

a good friend of mine had a free trial on match.com. He put a pic and everything. He got no responses.

I'm not gonna deal with that and waste $20.I'd rather buy pr0n with that. I'll just let it happen.

fbd · 03-09-2002, 03:14 AM

lent Wrote:I'm not gonna deal with that and waste $20.I'd rather buy pr0n with that. I'll just let it happen.

but you can do it for free in the "get me laid" section of overthelimit.com

Edited By fbdlingfrg on Mar. 08 2002 at 10:23

Arpikarhu · 03-09-2002, 03:22 AM

this thread has ikeaboy written all over it.

Galt · 03-09-2002, 06:12 AM

I wouldn't do any websites, because my roommate does it, and he is one of the biggest psychopaths I've ever met. Just everything about him skeeves me out. And the girls he meats are all twisted freaks who are on some sort of anti-depressent.

However, I did do 8minutedating.com once in Boston (which has a chapter in NYC as well) and it was cool. The majority of the people (men and women) were people that normally wouldn't leave the house, but the press of the thing got some decent looking girls there. In an hour you meet 8 girls (or guys depending on your thing) and then if you like them and they like you you get each other's contact info.

Pretty cool idea, and was pretty successful for me.

Edited By Galt on Mar. 09 2002 at 02:17