$200 Gift Certificate To The Mall

[Hoon]

So, my mother gave me a $200 gift certificate to the mall.
I don't need clothes. I have enough Van Husen dress shirts to last me a decade. I don't need jeans, coats, shoes, boots or cd's. I walked around the mall with my bride for three hours and couldn't find a single thing I wanted and the things I considered, my bride told me no. No to a shotgun from Dick's Sporting Goods, no to seasons 2, 3 and 4 of Curb Your Enthusiasm, no to an ipod because she say's I'll never use it and she's right and no to a sweet 19 volt cordless drill because I already have a 12 volt.

So, I left without getting anything. In this thread I'd like you to suggest something I could buy. Pretend YOU have a $200 gift certificate to the mall.

Thanks,
H.

[Gooch]

i could spend $200 with ease.

i'd buy books. check a watch store. if anything, a Tommy Bahama hawiian shirt, some gadgets. the idea is to buy something thats cool...who the FUCK cares if you need the fuckin thing.

[Hoon]

I don't read books. In order to do that I need complete silence and that is impossible at my house.

I don't wear watches because my wrists are ridiculously slim. I mean, they're downright feminine so a watch just looks silly.

I'm not a gadget guy.

I WANT to buy something cool but I don't want to buy something cool that's going to end up on my daughters playroom floor encased in playdough.

[Mad]

First mistake was bring the old ball 'n chain with you shopping. Does she wipe your ass for you after you've dumped?

[Hoon]

No. But if I don't listen I don't get any pussy and that my friend is like holding a royal flush.

[Charles Manson]

Go to a dollar store and buy 200 items. I bet that would be fun.

[Hoon]

Yes ma'am. I am seriously want to buy 300 tiny tubes of Crest toothpaste. YOU DEAL WITH ME NOW!!

[virgingrrl]

books.
music.
bras and panties.
new bedding.
movies.
bags.

its easy to spend $200.

ps. your mom gave you a shitty gift, she took all the effort out of finding you something, and in turn you have now made us work for your gift also. boooo.

[Hoon]

my mom did the best thing she could.
for after years of clearly fake reactions from me after opening garth brooks shirts, cheap cologne and faggoty man bracelets, she finally understood a gift certificate is the way to go.

[virgingrrl]

what exactly is a faggoty man bracelet?

[Hoon]

some sparkly silverish thing that looks like it belongs on an 80 year old jewish lady with bad taste.

i'm too much of a man to wear a bracelet in the first place. much less a gawdy one that shimmers.

[Keyser Soze]

trade it in for one of these...

<img src="http://i120.photobucket.com/albums/o171/cgull8m/bushbill1.jpg">

[Hoon]

I CAN'T GET THAT AT THE MALL

[drusilla]

head to sunglass hut for a pair of sunglasses. i treated myself to a pair of prada shields when i was in south beach over the summer. i'm quite happy with that purchase.

or put it towards a new flat screen tv for another room in the house.

if all else fails, give it to your wife & i'm sure she'll buy a pair of shoes, or a coat for herself. if you want, make her give you $200 bucks for it.

$200 bucks might cover a new set of sheets or two from calvin klein. the only bedding i've slept on for almost 10 years.

[Mad]

Egyptian cotton 1000/1200 TC > Calvin Klein, Miss Fancy Pants.

[Keyser Soze]

frette > everything else

[drusilla]

its about the style, don't really give a crap about the egyptian cotton

[GonzoStyle]

Egyptian cotton 1000/1200 TC > Calvin Klein, Miss Fancy Pants.

You wouldn't know Egyptian cotton if Pharaoh himself sent it to you, you knock-off wearing motherfucker.

[Gooch]

he shoots coons and uses their skin.

[Mad]

Egyptian cotton 1000/1200 TC > Calvin Klein, Miss Fancy Pants.

You wouldn't know Egyptian cotton if Pharaoh himself sent it to you, you knock-off wearing motherfucker.

OK, Mr. Star Wars sheet using cunt.