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+--- Thread: Marriage Schmarriage (/showthread.php?tid=3059)
Marriage Schmarriage - EffinC - 04-18-2004
Rant. Be forewarned.
I come from a divorced family. My dad was married and divorced prior to my mother. My dad is one of two, and has of course been divorced. My Mother is one of seven, 3 of whom have been divorced. My brother is divorced. My sister was just married in March and that marriage will actually have a great chance of lasting.
What's all this mean? I'm scared like a little bitch of getting married. I say time and time again that I will NEVER be married, and everyone gives you the story of how they said the same thing, and look where they ended up. I've broken up with 2 long term girlfriends because the desire for marriage was verbalized.
In all seriousness, how long can someone fend it off? When is the point at which your free will just breaks down and becomes a submissive mini-van driving nothing? I am not afraid of having to give up half, I'm afraid of becoming all of my friends that look like caged animals in their marriages.
I have this friend who used to be the man at parties and pickup games of any sport, the guy to yell road trip, etc etc etc. He's married with 2 kids, and he works his BALLS off at 3 jobs. He works bad hours so that he will have the most time with his kids as possible before they hit school age. He wants to come out and play basketball with us once a week, and his wife throws a tantrum. We play basketball from midnight-2AM, and his fucking wife pulls the "I spend all day with your children, and you want to go play basketball?"......mind you, this broad doesn't work and although raising children is an important job, atleast you're with people you love doing something that comes with the territory of parenthood.
This scares me to death. I want to settle down some day and own the little house with the picket fence, etc. I already have the job of my dreams (Law Enforcement Technician), and would love to have that extend into my personal life. The safest route of all is to simply not get married, and if push comes to shove I can get along that way.
Please post your marriage/divorce horror
stories in an effort to quell my dilemma.
Marriage Schmarriage - Rooner - 04-18-2004
It comes down to this. Just like women have a hard time finding a good man, men have just as hard a time finding a good woman. So it comes to the point that you find one thats really good and you dont want to take the chance of losing. The only way to do that is to marry them. I myself would be happy with just living with someone, pledging my life to them. But society has so ingrained it into little girls heads that you HAVE to get married, that the only way to hang onto the good one you find is to marry her. My mother has been married 4 times. My dad twice. Myself twice. One of my best friends twice. My brother twice. Its almost like divorce is inevitable. Its like your first marriage is a practice one so you can get the second one right. The reason most men look unhappy in marriage is because its like caging a wild animal, they get that distant look in their eyes and pace all the time because they are thinking of their "glory days" all the time. Its that whole "grass is greener" thing. I have a buddy thats got an awesome life. Hes 25, single, has his own place, 3 cars, a harley, a boat, tons of women just "stopping by", no cares. All he tells me is how jealous he is of meand my family. All I tell him is how crazy he would be to give up all he has for a family. At least right now. Enjoy life first. Im lucky in that I lived alot prior to settling down. I was ready. I felt I had done enough. Sure, theres plenty I didnt do and still want to. But when I walk through that door to see the faces of my family, I know theres nothing I want more. Cept maybe a society that excepts multiple partner marriages and Selma Hyek and Jessica Alba begging to marry me so they could be my sex slaves.
Marriage Schmarriage - header - 04-19-2004
Quote:I have this friend who used to be the man at parties and pickup games of any sport, the guy to yell road trip, etc etc etc. He's married with 2 kids, and he works his BALLS off at 3 jobs. He works bad hours so that he will have the most time with his kids as possible before they hit school age. He wants to come out and play basketball with us once a week, and his wife throws a tantrum. We play basketball from midnight-2AM, and his fucking wife pulls the \"I spend all day with your children, and you want to go play basketball?\"
:lol:
Quote:......mind you, this broad doesn't work and although raising children is an important job, atleast you're with people you love doing something that comes with the territory of parenthood
Raising children well at least for my wife raising my son has got to be one of the more physically and mentally exhausting job on the planet.
5am until 7 to 8pm this child is a nonstop ball of energy. He's also going through his momma's boy clingy stage to where it is difficult for her to even leave the room without him flipping out. (any parents with suggestions on how to curb this please let me know).
I work from 7-5 and I'm home before 6pm. I have a standing offer on the table for her to go out and hang out with her friends in the evenings that she rarely or never takes. UNderstandibly she is in bed and asleep by 9pm every night.
That all said, the only thing that would keep my wife from saying 'yeah go out with your friends have fun' is her physical exhaustion. My brother lives in the apartment above us so I go up there and hang out when my wife and son are asleep but I don't wander too far from our place just in case she calls me with a problem.
The key I think is to find someone who is understanding and appreciative of the concept of personal space. At the same time you need to be that way for her. If you're just like hey I'm going out with the guys and never say that you'll stay in so she can go out, it will never work out.
A plus is also to live in close proximity to someone a family member or friend willing to watch your rugrat at short notice so that you can get the hell out of the house. Getting regular time away from your children together is just as good as getting your time to yourself. Anything to clear your head.
Marriage doesn't have to be a death sentence. The problem is that people marry bitches who want everything done for them and aren't willing to give anything in return or they themselves are the selish ones. Either way it's all about sacrifice understanding and all that crap.
So quit your worrying already and find some chick that will let you go play basketball and give you regular bjs and shit. Just be sure to take her to dinner and give her her night out with her friends too.
Marriage Schmarriage - Rooner - 04-19-2004
I love teh header.
Marriage Schmarriage - header - 04-19-2004
What's sad is that I wrote all of that and didn't even have the respect to read all of your post.
Marriage Schmarriage - Keyser Soze - 04-19-2004
Quote:Law Enforcement Technician
what the fuck is that? a fancy word for a cop?
Marriage Schmarriage - Sloats - 04-19-2004
I have no horror stories to report. I found a woman who is not self-centered.
Marriage Schmarriage - Rooner - 04-19-2004
Quote:Originally posted by header
What's sad is that I wrote all of that and didn't even have the respect to read all of your post.
Id expect nothing less.
Marriage Schmarriage - Black Lazerus - 04-19-2004
Quote:Originally posted by Keyser Soze
Quote:Law Enforcement Technician
what the fuck is that? a fancy word for a cop?
no i think thats the guy who cleans the guns.
Marriage Schmarriage - Sloats - 04-19-2004
Quote:Originally posted by Black Lazerus
Quote:Originally posted by Keyser Soze
Quote:Law Enforcement Technician
what the fuck is that? a fancy word for a cop?
no i think thats the guy who cleans the guns.
Each cop is responsible for his own gun. The Law Enforcement Technician cleans the toilets.