It is my humble opinion

[Sleeper]

Originally posted by Bloody Anus
My research has yielded the following results:


and


Generally used after a particularly awkward, painfully awful, sexual joke. For example:


Cowtits: He should be put in the hole!

Bad poster: I'd sure like to be in your hole!


or


Cowtits: Please help my morbidly low self esteem by praising me and how fat my tits are. If you do I'll let you hold my hand at the next board gathering. tee hee!

which is often followed by,

Bad poster 1: I'm gonna touch more than that, beast tits!

Bad poster 2: lol

Beast tits:

not a bad poster: There's no need to post \"lol\" AND the smiley. They both imply the same thing.

Random MOD: knock it off or I'll move this thread and put you in the hole!

Bad poster 1: I'd sure like to be in your hole!

Bad poster 3:



Of course, the biggrin is not always used in a sexual context; it can also be used when trying to pass something off as being EXTRA funny. All this does is show how insecure the poster is, as illustrated by the fast attack the moment somebody disagrees:

Bad poster 1: Why don't skeletons ride on roller coasters?

















Because they don't have the GUTS!!!

Bad poster 2: lol

not a bad poster: that really wasn't very funny or amusing at all.

Bad poster 1:

Bad poster 2: You're ugly! and immature to!



Next there is the ridiculous moon emoticon:

Anybody who argues that this is amusing or that their post is strengthened by it should be killed by a drunk driver.


Perhaps the most telling find was of those emoticons which are used the least:


and


The former is named \"eureka\" and is illustrated by a light bulb going off in one's head. This implies that somebody has a great idea or something new to post. Obviously, it is difficult for a bad poster to generate new ideas or unique thoughts. Often the forgotten smilie, it would be completely unnoticed if it were to someday be removed.

Then there's \"puzzled\", with its implication being that the poster is confused by what's going on around them. This can either be used sarcastically, where it has the potential to work well, or to seriously convey that one does not understand what is happening. Bad posters tend to get lost fairly easily, but instead of admitting they're confused, they opt to lash out at what they don't understand, often digging themselves an even bigger hole by revealing how awful and unintelligent they really are.


Overall though, the most statistically significant (p < .05) finding was the almost direct correlation between board productivity and the (over)use of smilies, as indicated below:







These findings do not reflect my own personal opinions; they are FACTS, supported by RESEARCH and MATHEMATICS. As such, any attempted arguement or rebuttal would just be silly.

I am printing this and framing it.