CDIH

It's not gay if you didn't bust a nut.

wow. I've really led a very sheltered life.

I was thinking the same thing.

Abster Wrote:I was thinking the same thing.

we suck.

We might, but we don't eat cum snacks.

I think this year I am going to tape a garbage bag to my window and hope that Santa puts some loot in it... if I score I will celebrate with a Sugar Sammich.

If you really want to geth is attention be 100% authentic and use a plastic supermarket bag. If yu can pull that off I'll send you a box of jism snacks. Courtesy of Ken.

Quote:... box of jism snacks. Courtesy of Ken.

umm, EWWWWW?

my first encounter with porn was when i discovered a book called sex stars of the silver screen among the books in my parents bookshelf when i was about 7 or 8 years old. it was this hardcover book that had pictures of different actresses who had appeared nude in mainstream movies.

i was infatuated with the book, and for some reason treated it almost like a coloring book, circling the tits, asses, and pussy of the women in the book for reasons i can't really explain other than i guess in my 7 year old mind it was some kind of way of expressing how excited it made me.

i didn't learn how to masturbate until a few years after that, so i just used to look at this book and marvel at the images.

one day i ripped out a page from the book that had these really erotic shot of some actress fully nude on a bed, and put it in this little toy suitcase thing i had, and my parents found it. they weren't really angry at me, they just asked where i got it and i told them that i found it in the park outside our house. they didn't question it, i don't know why, and that was it. they didn't go and hide the book either after that and i continued to check it out until i discovered my fathers playboys in his closet soon after.

I actually kind of feel left out. I don't have any stories even close to being as good.

at times, luna and abster make me really wanna vomit.

and i've don't vomit easily.

How come?

just because im a hateful person at times

Yeah that would do it.

Ok. I have a few stories I can share.

My first interaction with porn was when I was about 11. My friend had swiped a video from his mom and came over to my house with it.

All at the same time, I felt excited, scared, and overall uncertainty. I was afraid of my mom coming into my room and catching us.

So he puts the tape in my vcr and we start to watch it.

After about 5 minutes we were both disgusted with it and I shut it off. We both knew what homosexuals were, and we felt like seeing a guys dick in a video somehow made us homos.

My mom didn't catch us watching it, which was a relief, and I told my friend I didn't want him to come over anymore. That lasted all of about 2 hours and I called him and I went to his house for dinner that day.

fuckin faggots

I did some stealing in my day as well. But not shoplifting.

The same friend from my previous story did shoplift though. I helped him conseal things a couple of times.

I remember going to Toys 'R' Us one time and putting a cheat code magazine up the back of his jacket so he could steal it.

I did stuff I thought was clever but really was just stupid. Like when we would go to the movies, I always wanted to play the video games. Every single time, after my game would end, I would go to the customer service counter and tell them that the game took my money and make them let me play again. It worked every time.

The most daring thing I ever did was steal a game from Blockbuster. I think I was about 15 at the time.

I rented a game one time for the Super Nintendo, and for the life of me cannot remember which one it was, but I liked it a lot. For Christmas that year, my mom had bought me the Crash Dummies game, but I despised it. So.. I switched the labels on the games and sent Crash Dummies back to Blockbuster.

Only thing is... my brother liked Crash Dummies. He went to play it later in that evening and found out what I had done. So the little fucker told my mom. She was furious with me. My dad yelled up the stairs and told me to come down from my room. The minute I stepped off the last stair, my mom socked me in the jaw. It was like a knockout punch in boxing. I was on the fucking floor.

Now let me tell you, my mom never hit me before that, and never hit me after that. That was a complete shock. I tell you though... I never stole a fuckin thing again.

The next day, my mom made me go with my dad to Blockbuster and tell the manager what I had done.

The manager charged me 6 bucks for the game and I ended up keeping both.

I felt really stupid after that.

I thought you like went in the store and jacked the game, i used to do that all the time with video tapes from the rental places here.

Just for kicks, I got my friend to take some of those silver warning labels they used to put on the tapes, his dad owned a video store.

I would rent whatever and then would open up the tapes and switch the tape inside. So when people would rent like sleepless in seattle, they would get howard the duck instead. Then I would steam off the residue just enough to replace the silver tampering label and then bring the movies back. There were like 5 video stores in the area and this was before they had computers, so they couldnt track it.

I would replace sappy popular films with what I thought people should be watching and people shoulda been appreciating classics like howard the duck and spaceballs!

it's a goddamn crime against humanity that Howard the Duck isn't on DVD by now.