I have been thinking of having children of my own alot lately.
But it's things like what happened the other day that make me second guess myself.
For instance, children ask too many annoying questions..
Just the other night I was giving my nephew a bath.
And he asks me, "Uncle Hoon? Why are our penis's different"?
I answered him honestly saying...
"Because mine is erect".
Should I mention that my nephew is 26?
yes, I like mine lightly seasoned with pepper and cooked on a rotisserie.
...If I ever own a coal or diamond mine, then, yes, children will become a necessity for me...
When I was a kid, I got my gonads entangled in a Slinky.
My dad said I was stupid and deserved it.
If he had only contacted Dave "The Hammer" Shapiro...
I could be cruisin' in a 69' Sting Ray, right now.
Children should be touched and not heard......I mean seen, seen, I always confuse that one.
Children are too bothersome and needy, that's what women are for. They may be cute for a couple of days but then they grow up to be ungrateful fucks. You gotta go through the whole rebel stage of them hating you and questioning everything, who needs that fuckin aggrivation? Then one day they remember you didn't give them a hug that one time back 20 years ago when they scraped their knee and they blow your head off.
No thanks, i'll buy a dog instead.
This was way too far to go for a dumb joke.
I replied to the topic title, I didn't really care enough to read the posts. Other people's petty problems are of no concern to me, only my own opinion.
IrishAlkey Wrote:This was way too far to go for a dumb joke.
No...
When your dad flung a spoon full of semen at your mom in the shower.
THAT was going too far for a joke.
And he payed dearly 9 months later.
Hoon Wrote:IrishAlkey Wrote:This was way too far to go for a dumb joke.
No...
When your dad flung a spoon full of semen at your mom in the shower.
THAT was going too far for a joke.
And he payed dearly 9 months later.
That may be the reason you haven't had any luck having kids of your own. You don't seem to have a grasp on how conception works.
Who the fuck jerks off on a spoon anyway?
I blame Goat for all of this.
seriously, i feel like ive stepped into a bad SNL skit
I'm going to randomly start tossing spoon fulls of semen on women.
IrishAlkey Wrote:I blame Goat for all of this.
You remind me of Apri...
What I knew of him.
A whole lot of hype but no results.
your sig is the worst attempt at humor EVER
You remind me of a person who could make Jack feel good about himself.
In the 15 minutes I have been here, I have realized I do not like Hoon.
IrishAlkey has given me comedy Blue Balls.
Quote:You remind me of Apri...
Apri?
Quote:this thread is the worst attempt at humor EVER
fixed