someone needs to confess

Arpikarhu · 08-05-2002, 02:56 PM

who killed Ikea? we all know the little couch troll never leaves the safety of his root cellar, yet he has been awol for over a week. someone here must have lured his pasty bloated self into the sunshine with the promise of vhs copies of the first season of petticoat junction and then killed him. while i am not against this action, far from it, i feel that it is time for someone to step up and claim responsibility.

diceisgod · 08-05-2002, 02:58 PM

Who?

Ken'sPen · 08-05-2002, 03:00 PM

Ikea is fine.......
He won't be posting much for the next couple of months....
He is at the head of the line for the Second installment of the Lord of the Rings.....

He assured me, there would be a lengthy review upon his return.

PollyannaFlower46 · 08-05-2002, 03:01 PM

Maybe he met a girl? :-)

Arpikarhu · 08-05-2002, 03:03 PM

Quote:Maybe he met a girl?

quick!! someone throw some cold water on polly!! she is delusional!!

Luna · 08-05-2002, 03:04 PM

Maybe he got a puppy?

fbd · 08-05-2002, 03:06 PM

i say he finally offed himself

diceisgod · 08-05-2002, 03:06 PM

Maybe he got an infectious, fatal disease?

Gooch · 08-05-2002, 03:07 PM

christ...i hope someone bought that puppy some anal-eze

Arpikarhu · 08-05-2002, 03:07 PM

infectious implies human contact. get real!

PollyannaFlower46 · 08-05-2002, 03:07 PM

I say he maybe met a girl, either that or he killed his mother....but this definitely has to do with a woman.

Gooch · 08-05-2002, 03:09 PM

maybe he's going around with a chainsaw, trying to keep his mom's skin fresh and supple.

Sloatsburgh · 08-05-2002, 03:09 PM

I say nothing happend in the news that interested him.

Arpikarhu · 08-05-2002, 03:10 PM

if a dog farts he cuts and pastes it, so i think that cant be it

Corpsegrinder13 · 08-05-2002, 03:12 PM

Do we honestly care?

NaughtyAngel · 08-05-2002, 03:16 PM

i really wanna know what he's up to, i agree with fldnlkfsjlksljdsk, he finally realized how worthless he is and ended it

i just really was hoping we'd see something on the news about it

Sean Cold · 08-05-2002, 03:17 PM

Quote:Do we honestly care?

Yes, some of us do you cold hearted cunt. Ikeaboy was a pillar of this board and is sorely missed by all.

Arpikarhu · 08-05-2002, 03:18 PM

Sean, should we put a black armband on the new t-shirts if he is really dead?

PollyannaFlower46 · 08-05-2002, 03:20 PM

If something didn't happen to Ikea and he sees this, I bet you'll all be sorry.

Sean Cold · 08-05-2002, 03:20 PM

Yes, we should.

We can put his CDIH Member number and have a service for him at home plate at Van Courtland park.