The Random Galt & Gonzo Childhood Memories Thread

[Keyser Soze]

they smelled really good too.

smurfs smelled really good too for some reason. i can't even describe the smell but it was fantastic.

[drusilla]

that might be the most depressing / pathetic thing ever

[Hawt Baux]

which?

[drusilla]

your story about the rabbit. i didnt see that keyser cut me.

[Goatweed]

that poor bunny.

[Hawt Baux]

We did it to save his life and ended up killing him.

Clearly didnt think it out too well.

[Keyser Soze]

it was an admirable act of kindness.

[GonzoStyle]

I thought we already did this, in the "confess childhood animal killings" thread, dumb faces!

[Galt]

when I painted houses, I used to grab bugs all the time (mostly daddy longlegs and throw them in my paint, or on the side of the bucket and watch them struggle for their life.

It's like quick sand, the more they struggled the more fucked they got.

I probably killed a handful a day, over the course of 5 days a week for about 8 summers.

[GonzoStyle]

figures that most of us tortured animals as kids.

Like the time I was playing with my dog and she was still a puppy, so she was pretty small. I used to pick her up and woosh her around like she was flying. Then one day for no comprehensible reason, I held her under her paw pits and held her out the 5th floor window of our apartment building. She started to flinch and I almost lost my grip, that woulda sucked big time.

Then I used to love playing hockey with the glue traps when a mouse was in it, good stuff.

[Hawt Baux]

My Godfather used to send me little pet animals for birthdays and holidays, etc.

For Easter one year he sent me a box of baby chicks and i fell in love. I thought they were the most adorable little creatures i'd ever seen in my life.

I would let them out in the living room to run around and play with one another. So one day my brother's friend ran through the room and swung the backdoor open while i had my little babies out and one of them b-lined it to the door as he was slamming it shut.

SQUASH.

He murdered my baby duck...chicken...thing and then shortly after the other two chicklings perished.

I'm pretty sure i told this story before but it ties in with the dead animals theme.

[funsnapsdyno]

I need to preface the story with, I was like 8 years old, I had no clue what gay was or that it was wrong or bad.

still working up the courage.

Did you have a sword fight?

[funsnapsdyno]

I'm skipping over anything to do with the poor rabbits and puppies

[GonzoStyle]

So I remember one day when my cousin and I were like 8 or 9. We were watching I think it was "48 hours" with Eddie Murphy & Nick Nolte. There was a scene where this chick was topless and I was like oh man!!!! My cousin was like "please, thats nothing". So he took me to his parents bedroom and put a porno on and we were like so amazed by it.

So all of a sudden my cousin breaks out one of those old school vibrators, the type that were sold as "back massagers" but obviously it was used by women for masturbatory activity. It was actually the vibrator one of the strippers had in "bachelor party".

So he powers on the vibrator and its like this long handle, about maybe 16" and at the top it has like this like pencil eraser shaped head and it vibrates. So he tells me "hey, put this on it and it feels really good".....

now let me preface once again, we're a couple of doofy kids with awful parents who taught us nothing! we had no clue what sex was in reality, it just looked interesting to us and the people looked like they were having fun. And we didnt like boys, we werent fags and to us gay wasn't even in the vocabulary.

So I pull down my sweat pants and take out the little button sized schmekel and put the vibrator on it... and dammit if it didnt feel all tingly and funny. All of a sudden it was like a full 3 inches!!! I was fuckin addicted to this thing.

My cousin is laying there and watching...

ugh this just will never sound right.

He compliments my penis and says it looks nice, then he takes out his and asks me what I think and I say "not bad".

Then he told me to put the vibrator away cause it was getting warm and his mom many know he was using it, if she comes home and touches it... so I assume now that he had gotten caught before.

So anyway, there we are laying in bed, naked, watching a porno. Playing with our little toddler schmekels and all of a sudden my cousin asks.. "can I touch yours?".....

ok, look, we're family, he was my best friend and I didnt see nothing wrong with it, nor did I WANT him to touch it but i'm not gonna be mean and say NO!

So he touched it like we were kinda role playing with the porno and he didnt touch it for more than maybe 30 seconds, so it wasnt like he was allover it for like a long time.

There is more to the story but I gotta stop now, i'm not sure I wanna share what happened next, until I get a reaction to this so far...

[Abster]

Do the words limp wristed hiney tapper mean anything to you?

Please continue, it's really a sweet story.

[funsnapsdyno]

tee hee !

[funsnapsdyno]

Guys are funny.. look you were young and curious. It doesn't make you gay. Altho since it was your cousin, that's just sick !

[Abster]

I say it makes him gay. Not really, but he hasn't been mad at me in like a day so....

[Galt]

did his semen taste different than yours does?

[GonzoStyle]

did his semen taste different than yours does?

we were like 8, we couldnt cum, it just felt funny in a good way.