i think Andy Kaufman actually died of AIDS

[diceisgod]

And they covered it up calling it a "rare" form of lung cancer. I've heard of these "rare" diseases before. It's what the doctors call something when they don't know what the fuck's going on. When I was a really young, like 3-4 years old, I had a "rare" case of pneumonia but I suspect that one of my parents either tried to poison me or they were somehow negligent. I was in the hospital for 3 months and I almost died from it too, I got so sick at one point my kidneys shut down and I swelled up like a blow fish. The doctors called the family and told them they better come to the hospital now because this might be it. But somehow I recovered and in part I had to learn how to walk again. So I was thinking that if maybe we dug up Andy and taught him how to walk again, he would get better. And before you you ask, no i'm not stoned...ok I really am, ok? But I did almost die from "rare" pneumonia alledgedly and I think Andy actually had the HIVs.

[faceman802]

wow, just wow

[GonzoStyle]

One time I had to go to the hospital cause I shoved a peanut M&M up my nose.

[faceman802]

you stole that from the simpsons and it was a crayon not an m&m

[Mad]

DIG has AIDS.

[GonzoStyle]

you stole that from the simpsons and it was a crayon not an m&m

No, it was a peanut M&M, I remember that night very well. When I got out my cousin met me and gave me the gayest toy ever as a present, the fuckin tiger or whatever that fuckin thing was from the he-man cartoons. I was so dissapointed, he told me he had gotten me something really cool that I wanted, when what I really wanted was the thunder tank from thundercats.

[faceman802]

The gayest toy ever is either the oozinator which is a water gun that after pumped continously sprays a white gooey substance on your opponent or the aquaman doll circa 1970's

[GonzoStyle]

ooh speaking of ooze

when I was like 7 or 8 I guessm I found a bar of those ex lax chocolates, and it was for whatever reason in the couch cushion. The fuckin things looked like a hersey bar if I remember, so I figured the shit is chocolate. So I assume you had to take like one of the little bricks and I ate the whole bar, which was like 9 or 12 I guess. Naturally I fuckin let loose like a geyser.

So once again it was a trip to the hospital for me. I dont remember what they did, I remember lying on my stomach and the doc doing something to my ass, while I spewed doo doo on him.

So I guess everytime I went to the hospital, I got a toy when I got out (maybe thats why I was always doing shit like this).

So this time I got a cool toy, I got the fire house from the ghostbusters. I was so fuckin happy, I get home and rip it open and am setting it up, then I notice.. NO FUCKIN SLIME!!! On the box it had a picture of a can which was supposed to have slime in it and there was none in the box!!!

So I went to the store and of course my grandma bought it from the fuckin mexican shop, which probably got it off some crackhead who stole it from toys r us.

So they gave me some fuckin knock off slime, it was around halloween time and the fuckin slime was like not even slimey, it was like ky-jelly. It fuckin stained the whole fire house and I was so pissed, I started crying and threw a tantrum, then threw the entire fire house out the 5th floor window.

[faceman802]

So once again it was a trip to the hospital for me. I dont remember what they did, I remember lying on my stomach and the doc doing something to my ass, while I spewed doo doo on him.

This explains so much

[GonzoStyle]

what does it explain?

[faceman802]

your latent homosexual tendencies

[GonzoStyle]

I dont have latent homo tendancies!!!

only for Ben Affleck but come on, its Ben!!!

[faceman802]

did the doctor at the hospital look like ben

[GonzoStyle]

I dont remember anything about it, except me lying on the table, ripping ass.

[faceman802]

are you anally dominant since then?

[GonzoStyle]

I have zero clue what that even means

[faceman802]

i couldnt think of any other way to put it. um do you like things in, around or on your ass since then

[GonzoStyle]

I like taking shits, so I love shit coming out of my ass but never going into it.

[faceman802]

so i have this one doctor who did "things" to you when you were young....there is this dr. dino who you idolize. do you watch ER or scrubs or grey's anatomy and think about the doctor's there?

[Galt]

I almost died from Chicken Pox. I got it when I was 4 years old. I actually remember most of it, but I don't recally my family freaking out about it like they apparently did.

I got a chicken pock underneath my eyelid, which caused the entire right side of my face to swell up like Sloth.

I guess it was pretty touch and go for about two weeks, but I have a distinct memory of standing in front of the mirror alone in the hallway going to my bedroom and picking a scab off my eye.

My mother talks about this "miraculous", "sudden" recover from Chicken Pox, and I'm pretty sure that I pulled Cancer off my face that day.