Those wacky germans.

[GonzoStyle]

BERLIN (Reuters) - Human sperm become excited when exposed to the scent of lily of the valley, doubling their speed and homing in on the aroma, a German scientist said on Wednesday.

Hans Hatt, a biology professor at Ruhr University in Bochum, said knowledge about a newly discovered odor receptor on the sperm's surface could enable researchers to devise alternative contraception methods or ways to boost fertility.

"This is the first time sperm has been shown to respond to smell," Hatt, who said the findings came after three years of study, told Reuters. "The application of the substances in a salve to the vaginal area could raise the chance of conceiving."

Only in germany could they spend three years wiping down vaginas with potpourri and come to the realization that cum not only smells but can smell.

[Metalfan]

How do you think it would respond to some of the hatchet wounds in this place?

[GonzoStyle]

I don't know how sperm respond to the smell of skank.

[Metalfan]

turned to dust is my guess

[GonzoStyle]

Is it the smell or the smorgasborg of STD's?

By the by, good morning metal my old friend, we haven't had a chance to bond in a while buddy. Thought i'd take the time to say how much I love ya :loveya:

[Metalfan]

Never considered the STD angle....good call. Do they make bio-terrorist hazmat suits for sperm yet?

By the way Gonz, I feel honored and privileged that you took a moment out of your busy day to personally wish me a good day. I return those well wishes to you 1000 times over. I'm here for ya if you need me, pal :loveya:

[GonzoStyle]

Those germans are so far ahead of us I tell ya, here some skank would be all up in arms about having weird herbs being inserted in their twats. Yet over there they don't care if you shove in a champagne bottle elbow deep, those nazi bitches are so hot.

[Metalfan]

After all those years of being royally fucked by their government, a champagne bottle probably slides in nice and easy :thumbs-up:

[GonzoStyle]

I bet when saddam wasn't stock piling weapons he was buyin from germany. He was getting mad german porn, those are the best. They do anything and everything, fuckin weirdos.

I bet thats where saddam figured out most of his torture techniques.

[Metalfan]

Dude, I think there are pages in Saddam's book that the Germans never thought of.......they say his sons are even sicker bastards. Think they'd make good posters?

[GonzoStyle]

Speaking of posters, I wish they would show more iraqi's beating the posters of Saddam with their shoes. That was pure comedy gold.

His sons are actually sicker though, they are more into the torture stuff than even saddam is. They love taping the tortures like the nazi's did and watching them.

[Metalfan]

Iraqi porn?

[GonzoStyle]

I've never seen iraqi porn, by torture vids I mean real torture.

They actually pay artists and architects to design torture chambers, they have contests over there for that shit. They not only want them to be effective but to look artsy and shit. They had this one guy design this complex layout of pipes along a ceiling. They throw some poor mook in there naked, and the pipes have 20 or so valves which come in no apparent order one by one. They leak out acid which burns right through the flesh down to the bone. This requires the person to constantly be in motion looking up, never knowing which valve is turning on next. They increase the number that go on at a time till the person is dead, some people suffer for countless hours.

Ofcourse nothing beats their degredation of women, the only country to have rapists on the goverment payroll.

[Metalfan]

Yeah, I saw the same thing on either Dateline, 60 Minutes or some other similar show. Sick fucking freaks. Just think, if that is how they treat their own people, what do they have in store for our military, when/if captured.

[Jack]

[b]By the by, good morning metal my old friend, we haven't had a chance to bond in a while buddy. Thought i'd take the time to say how much I love ya :loveya:

Back up off my shit.. Bitch. Find your own Damn flunkie. :angry: neak:

[GonzoStyle]

I have a flunkie, I have a couple by the by.

When my crazy thrill killa nigga, laz ain't around, I got Cowboy. It's his birthday today and he's feelin pretty froggy so I'd watch myself if I was you.

[Jack]

You steal all my friends. :-(

How dare you claim Cowboy too. :-(

[GonzoStyle]

Cowboy is the fuckin coolest, you can send any flunkie you want, he'll break who you send him.

[Metalfan]

Jack...I haven't been feeling the love lately from ya, buddy. I don't normally show up on Gonz's radar screen.....but on this fine morning in April...I'm there :bouncer:

[GonzoStyle]

You're always on my radar buddy, I just don't always say it.