07-14-2003, 04:30 AM
So I go to Montreal this weekend.
The weekened had a few stories, but the last one is by far the most interesting. This is a second hand account
One of the guys (no, it was not me. I have never paid -- directly at least -- for a girl to touch me) was unsuccessful in picking up a willing woman last night, and therefore he called a hooker to be delivered to his room at 6AM on Saturday night (Sunday Morning -- meaning like 20 hours ago).
So the girl arrives, barely speaking engish like most of the women in Montreal, but she was good enough for a 6AM hooker on a drunken night. He, as is the custom, paid her up front. The problem was that he was sharing a room with his friend (who pretended to be asleep but took copious notes), and therefore all the lights were off when they started GETTING IT ON ('member when Farley did that cool thing with that arms in Billy Madison?? That was funny)
aside: This is the type of kid who makes friends with strippers. He did that last night. We went to a strip club last night, and left around 10 to go to the club, and he decided to meet up with us because he was hitting it off with a dancer he'd already spent $200 on. So, with the hooker was actually making pillow talk. She was so beautiful, does she ever go down to Massachusetts, blah blah blah. He is also desperate and was "fooled" by a tranny named Michael he met at a bar a couple weeks ago
He starts making love to his woman. Caressing, fondling, and really taking it slow and romantic. He did wear a rubber. Just because I told him that Suzie would have been pissed had he not.
After he finished, the light goes on so she can get he clothes on, and he looks down and it's like the horsehead in the movie producer's bed in the Godfather. Blood everywhere. He was covered in blood. From his waist to his knees. Down his legs, puddles by his feet. He starts screaming at her, she starts crying, she can't talk back because she doesn't speak english, so he starts screaming louder like you do to deaf people who can't understand. He started to threaten to throw her off the 8th floor balcony, and finally just threw her out of the room (forgetting to ask for his money back), and immediately rumped in the shower. He was in the shower for an hour alternating between trying to scrub her uterus off his body and sobbing uncontrollably pondering mortality, SARS, Hepatitis, AIDS, and other possible diseases he may have contracted from this filthy whore.
After breakfast this morning, his roommate told us, and obviously we needed to make a surprise trip to his room. This wasn't merely the hooker having her period, after seeing the Bateman sheets this morning, I firmly believe she had a miscarriage last night. We LAUGHED!!!! He cried. We laughed again.
The weekened had a few stories, but the last one is by far the most interesting. This is a second hand account
One of the guys (no, it was not me. I have never paid -- directly at least -- for a girl to touch me) was unsuccessful in picking up a willing woman last night, and therefore he called a hooker to be delivered to his room at 6AM on Saturday night (Sunday Morning -- meaning like 20 hours ago).
So the girl arrives, barely speaking engish like most of the women in Montreal, but she was good enough for a 6AM hooker on a drunken night. He, as is the custom, paid her up front. The problem was that he was sharing a room with his friend (who pretended to be asleep but took copious notes), and therefore all the lights were off when they started GETTING IT ON ('member when Farley did that cool thing with that arms in Billy Madison?? That was funny)
aside: This is the type of kid who makes friends with strippers. He did that last night. We went to a strip club last night, and left around 10 to go to the club, and he decided to meet up with us because he was hitting it off with a dancer he'd already spent $200 on. So, with the hooker was actually making pillow talk. She was so beautiful, does she ever go down to Massachusetts, blah blah blah. He is also desperate and was "fooled" by a tranny named Michael he met at a bar a couple weeks ago
He starts making love to his woman. Caressing, fondling, and really taking it slow and romantic. He did wear a rubber. Just because I told him that Suzie would have been pissed had he not.
After he finished, the light goes on so she can get he clothes on, and he looks down and it's like the horsehead in the movie producer's bed in the Godfather. Blood everywhere. He was covered in blood. From his waist to his knees. Down his legs, puddles by his feet. He starts screaming at her, she starts crying, she can't talk back because she doesn't speak english, so he starts screaming louder like you do to deaf people who can't understand. He started to threaten to throw her off the 8th floor balcony, and finally just threw her out of the room (forgetting to ask for his money back), and immediately rumped in the shower. He was in the shower for an hour alternating between trying to scrub her uterus off his body and sobbing uncontrollably pondering mortality, SARS, Hepatitis, AIDS, and other possible diseases he may have contracted from this filthy whore.
After breakfast this morning, his roommate told us, and obviously we needed to make a surprise trip to his room. This wasn't merely the hooker having her period, after seeing the Bateman sheets this morning, I firmly believe she had a miscarriage last night. We LAUGHED!!!! He cried. We laughed again.
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