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+--- Thread: Something to offend everyone (/showthread.php?tid=3727)
Something to offend everyone - Biff - 12-08-2009
Q. What's the Cuban National Anthem?
A. Row, Row, Row Your Boat.
Q. Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
A. A different bar.
Q. What did the Chinese couple name their tan, curly-haired baby?
A. Sum Ting Wong.
Q. What do you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
A. A speech impediment.
Q. Why aren't there any Puerto Ricans on Star Trek ?
A. Because they're not going to work in the future either.
Q. Why do Driver Ed classes in redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays?
A. Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.
Q. What's the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?
A. The southern zoo has a description of the animal along with a recipe.
Q How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the 'F' word?
A. Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell, 'BINGO!'
Q. What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale???
A. A northern fairytale begins, ...'Once upon a time...'
A southern fairytale begins,.... 'Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit.'
Q. Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team?
A. Because all the Mexicans who can run, jump or swim are already in the United States.
Re: Something to offend everyone - krystal - 12-08-2009
:clap: :clap: :clap:
Political correctness is for pussies.
Re: Something to offend everyone - Allyson - 12-08-2009
So basically I'm more intelligent than Southerners and I talk with my hands. Oooh, burn.
Re: Something to offend everyone - krystal - 12-08-2009
Allyson Wrote:So basically I'm more intelligent than Southerners and I talk with my hands. Oooh, burn.
Yeah, but I'd rather have a Southern accent than a Jersey accent. *snap*
Re: Something to offend everyone - potthole - 12-08-2009
Bravo!
Re: Something to offend everyone - plumpenut - 12-08-2009
krystal Wrote:Allyson Wrote:So basically I'm more intelligent than Southerners and I talk with my hands. Oooh, burn.
Yeah, but I'd rather have a Southern accent than a Jersey accent. *snap*
well you know I would actually like to hear what Allyson sounds like before I pass judgement.
Btw no polish jokes?
Re: Something to offend everyone - Queenie - 12-09-2009
You want polish jokes?
A Polish man was walking down the street carrying a brown paper bag. He ran into one of his buddies, who asked, "Hey! What's in the bag?"
The man tells his friend that he has some fish in the bag. His friend says, "Well, I'll make you a bet. If I can guess how many fish you have in the bag, you'll have to give me one."
The man says, "I'll tell you what. If you tell me how many fish I have in this bag, I'll give you both of them."
________
Did you hear about the Polish family that froze to death outside atheater?
They were waiting to see the movie "Closed for the Winter."
________
A polish guy wins a brand new sports car in a contest. He drives around all the time waving at the rednecks. One day the rednecks stop him, they draw a circle in the dirt and say "If you step out of that circle, we will kick your ass."
They pick up hammers and start busting up his new car. They look back and the is smiling. They hit the car some more, and he is laughing. They walk over to him and ask "Why are you laughing, we just busted up your car." He says "I know, but I stepped out of the circle 9 times."
Re: Something to offend everyone - fustercluck - 12-09-2009
What's the difference between cigarettes and jews?
cigs don't scream when you burn them.
Re: Something to offend everyone - zdunklee - 12-09-2009
How do you stop a black guy from drowning?
Take your foot off his head.
Re: Something to offend everyone - fustercluck - 12-10-2009
I went to Wal-Mart and saw they had Obama Christmas ornaments...ain't that a bitch? Suddenly it's okay to hang a ni&&er from a tree again