12-09-2008, 11:01 AM
A Note For All Men
After carefully reading your note, women decided to address some issues of our own...pretend it's a hockey game and pay attention:
*If the floor is an acceptable clothing location then you are not allowed to bitch when your pants haven't been washed in god knows how long...if the kids can find the hamper, so can you.
*If you have been with us longer than 4 monthly cycles then it should be stored in your long term memory what products we need and when we need them so be prepared to bring them home ahead of time to solve all problems.
*Same rules apply when we are watching our shows. Ask your questions later as well. You know you do it too...........
*The reason why we want you to stay on the channel when there is a commercial is you seem to forget what we were watching before and you never turn it back in time, only to miss the part we were waiting for when the commercial started.
*As long as you help with the laundry it's all good.
*We can call and discuss any thing we want....were women and we talk, get over it already. You don't want us talking to other wives/ girlfriends, then maybe YOU should talk to us...just a suggestion.
*Why don't you try driving with some sense if you don't like our response. It's not a NASCAR track, there are families on the road. Drive like a bat out of hell when we are not with you. Problem solved.
*After seeing some of your shirts, you might want to start LOOKING then shopping and don't forget to try your stuff on...takes 10 mins. and you can make sure it fits to avoid any unnecessary trips to the mall for returns.This should help with the telling you what to wear also.
*Usually we ask because when we don't and we arrive somewhere you always, without fail, say "why are you wearing that?"
*You need to put the seat down because sometimes it's dark and we really have to go and don't always look and it's a cold, wet place to sit and it saves any further arguments so just do it already. get over it.
*If you sprinkle when you tinkle, please be neat and wipe the seat.
*There is a wide variety of items to cook on the BBQ, try something other than hamburgers...
*YOU KNOW YOU YELL FROM ACROSS THE HOUSE TOO. We'll both have to work on this one.
*Also, try looking at our faces when talking to us...the boobies will not talk back to you. The 2 words you need to use everyday to have a good marriage is YES DEAR. Regardless. Don't try to win the argument, make your point, try to be right, it's useless. We will always be right, even if we're wrong...which we'll never admit and you're not allowed to bring up. Ever.
*Foreplay is more than saying "hey lets eff." You put a little effort into our sex life, so will we.
Thanks for your understanding,
The Women
After carefully reading your note, women decided to address some issues of our own...pretend it's a hockey game and pay attention:
*If the floor is an acceptable clothing location then you are not allowed to bitch when your pants haven't been washed in god knows how long...if the kids can find the hamper, so can you.
*If you have been with us longer than 4 monthly cycles then it should be stored in your long term memory what products we need and when we need them so be prepared to bring them home ahead of time to solve all problems.
*Same rules apply when we are watching our shows. Ask your questions later as well. You know you do it too...........
*The reason why we want you to stay on the channel when there is a commercial is you seem to forget what we were watching before and you never turn it back in time, only to miss the part we were waiting for when the commercial started.
*As long as you help with the laundry it's all good.
*We can call and discuss any thing we want....were women and we talk, get over it already. You don't want us talking to other wives/ girlfriends, then maybe YOU should talk to us...just a suggestion.
*Why don't you try driving with some sense if you don't like our response. It's not a NASCAR track, there are families on the road. Drive like a bat out of hell when we are not with you. Problem solved.
*After seeing some of your shirts, you might want to start LOOKING then shopping and don't forget to try your stuff on...takes 10 mins. and you can make sure it fits to avoid any unnecessary trips to the mall for returns.This should help with the telling you what to wear also.
*Usually we ask because when we don't and we arrive somewhere you always, without fail, say "why are you wearing that?"
*You need to put the seat down because sometimes it's dark and we really have to go and don't always look and it's a cold, wet place to sit and it saves any further arguments so just do it already. get over it.
*If you sprinkle when you tinkle, please be neat and wipe the seat.
*There is a wide variety of items to cook on the BBQ, try something other than hamburgers...
*YOU KNOW YOU YELL FROM ACROSS THE HOUSE TOO. We'll both have to work on this one.
*Also, try looking at our faces when talking to us...the boobies will not talk back to you. The 2 words you need to use everyday to have a good marriage is YES DEAR. Regardless. Don't try to win the argument, make your point, try to be right, it's useless. We will always be right, even if we're wrong...which we'll never admit and you're not allowed to bring up. Ever.
*Foreplay is more than saying "hey lets eff." You put a little effort into our sex life, so will we.
Thanks for your understanding,
The Women