02-17-2009, 07:57 PM
Mad Dog Wrote:My problem here is I'm one of those "all or nothing" kind of guys. When I was living as a Christian I would go for a month with out masterbating which was like eternity. It would feel like my balls were on fire and and my brain would get fuzzy. But then I was like "God will forgive me just this once" Then.... well....Right, believe me I understand how you were feeling. I think this isn't anything to blame God for however. This is something that you struggle with (by you I am generalizing the human race as a whole). We are taught that once a sin is forgiven that's it, your washed clean. God forgets but we have a hard time letting go. I would say, and forgive me if I'm wrong, that based off of your previous posts that you went in search for God so that you wouldn't lose your wife. When he didn't allow that to happen you started to become bitter towards him and instead of seeing where he might be leading you now you are closing your eyes. Maybe if you started over with better intentions you might get something more out of it.
Anyway, a couple of days later I would be SOOOO wracked with guilt, begging for Gods forgivness, I would accept his forgivness in Christs blood then a month later BAM!!! same thing. I couldn't take it and I felt like I was insane.
Well, I guess that we all learned a lesson today. That it's what's inside a person that counts. And that on the inside, midgets are thieving little bastards.