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Dad Your Not Dead!!
#6
Or maybe when you're really old and have some horrible disease, one of us could come over and spend time with you...and then write your book "Tuesdays with Mad Dog".
Everyday you reinvent yourself into a bigger cock-shite than ever. It's incredible. I don't know how you do it. I admire you.

I think that this situation absolutely requires a really futile and stupid gesture be done on somebody's part.
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