Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
What do you steal or have you stolen ?
#1
When I worked at the library I helped myself to a nice supply of sharpies, and I still have a few of them.

When I was in college, Just like Zane, I made generous use of the McDonalds, throw out the old sandwiches policy. I would take BAGS full of hamburgers, cheeses burgers, and Quarter Pounders back to my house on campus, and let my roomies feast.

And I think that anything you can get away from Wal Mart without paying for it is ok. But only at Wal Mart.
Wowie Groovie !
Reply
#2
I guess I'm just too much of a goody two shoes when it comes to stealing. I tried to steal a pen from Kroger's in the 8th grade, and when I looked to see if I was being watched, I took the wrong pen. I decided that if I wasn't even good enough to steal a pen, then I wasn't good enough to steal anything else. Plus I guess I have too many morals or something.
Reply
#3
I have probably taken a pen or 2 from work. That's about it. I'm too much of a conformist. I know no matter who here can see me, He is always watching.
Hey doc, do you know the address of that place?
Oh, you know, I do know the address. It's at the corner of go fuck yourself and buy a map!
Reply
#4
I have only stolen things once. It was magic cards (a collectible trading card game, just ask titan for details) and I only stole two packs. Somehow I got a twenty dollar card out of that.
Reply
#5
Took a couple dozen pens from the TV station I interned at in high school. I'll bet you're all impressed. :Smile
Reply
#6
In college, (of course), there was construction on the one main road and a huge caterpillar machine was left unlocked and I climbed in and took the guy's keychain (left the keys), a hustler, the one shift knob, and a whole roll of caution tape.

When attending a basketball game at a branch campus there was a big hand written sign on the main gym doors that said, "Keep small children between adults, a ball deflected, a small child protected". I of course had to have that.

When walking through a small town with my friend, we came a cross a big Servicing/Garage sign on a dealership building, it was probably about 6 feet long and 4 feet tall and it had a few brands I liked so we climbed up and tore it down (it turned out to be made of plywood and very heavy). We proceeded to walk back to where we parked and my friend was carrying it but every time a car passed he would quick throw it down on the ground and act nonchalant. After about 10 times of this the next car turned out to be a cop. He stopped and asked what the heck we were doing and what we kept throwing down every time a car passed. My friend had a rather unusual sense of humor and replied, "Finders keepers!" Amazingly, we were let go and told to put it back. We put it right back, into my trunk. The dumbest part is probably that its too big to put up anywhere in my place but I still have it.

When offroading with my drunken hick friends in their built up Jeeps outside of State College, we were in state game land tearing it up late one night and we came across a stern sign regarding horseplay with a funny picture of people on atv's and in trucks. It was on a huge wooden post. I casually remarked that I would love to have that sign, but it looked bolted on pretty good. The driver said, "oh you want that? and backed over the whole damn thing. So I got the sign with about 2 feet of post as well.
Humans are not rational beings, they are rationalizing
Practice safe sex, do it in a Volvo ___________ "Shut up", he explained.
Reply
#7
Titan, i dare you to steal from my Walmart, I'd kick your butt. There's nothing more satisfying than to catch some stupid thief trying to make off with something and getting caught in the act. I never stole anything
Reply
#8
ashleykme Wrote:Titan, i dare you to steal from my Walmart, I'd kick your butt. There's nothing more satisfying than to catch some stupid thief trying to make off with something and getting caught in the act. I never stole anything

Totally unrelated to this thread, but this post here reminded me of back when I was in high school, working at a Dick's Sporting Goods.

We had some dude steal a kyak. Walked right in, went straight to the second floor, grabbed the kyak, and walked right out with it. Even waved and said thanks to the cashiers as he went out the door.

Nobody really thought much at the time, because they figured he had paid for it already. It wasn't that uncommon to see somebody back their car or truck up to the door, to pick up a boat or other large item, so everybody just assumed that was the case again. Oops.
Reply
#9
potthole Wrote:
ashleykme Wrote:Titan, i dare you to steal from my Walmart, I'd kick your butt. There's nothing more satisfying than to catch some stupid thief trying to make off with something and getting caught in the act. I never stole anything

Totally unrelated to this thread, but this post here reminded me of back when I was in high school, working at a Dick's Sporting Goods.

We had some dude steal a kyak. Walked right in, went straight to the second floor, grabbed the kyak, and walked right out with it. Even waved and said thanks to the cashiers as he went out the door.

Nobody really thought much at the time, because they figured he had paid for it already. It wasn't that uncommon to see somebody back their car or truck up to the door, to pick up a boat or other large item, so everybody just assumed that was the case again. Oops.

I'd call that testicular fortitude. A whole f'ing kayak ?

I have a friend at Best Buy who told me that their floor model Nikon 5d got stolen, they guy just snapped it off the base just below the security alarm and walked out with it.
Wowie Groovie !
Reply
#10
Torque Wrote:In college, (of course), there was construction on the one main road and a huge caterpillar machine was left unlocked and I climbed in and took the guy's keychain (left the keys), a hustler, the one shift knob, and a whole roll of caution tape.

I think I love you.

but you're from PA so you probably have webbed toes
Wowie Groovie !
Reply
#11
Back when I was in High School, every night beofre a football game, we would drive to the town who's team we were playing and steal either a construction cone or a similar item, and then take it back to our locker room. At the end of the season, we'd have like 15 cones placed in the locker room, on top of the lockers. We would then give them to the janitors at our school. That way, if the cops ever came, the janitors would be blamed.

I travel regionally for my job. I'll walk in to a convenience store, or a little mom-n-pop, and steal condiment packets, plastic silverware, and the like, then drive to another store and buy my food sundries for the night. Or, visa versa. Walk in to a store, buy my groceries, and if they don't have something I need for condiments/silverware/spices, I'll go to another store and kyfe what I need somewhere else.

Hotels are another treasure trove. Even if I'm not stying there at that exact time, but have stayed there in the past, I'll stroll right in to the continental breakfast area and chow down. Or, I'll use their internet for awhile. I'll take washcloths, rolls of TP, hand sanitizer, and other small, insignificant items.
Reply
#12
ashleykme Wrote:Titan, i dare you to steal from my Walmart, I'd kick your butt. There's nothing more satisfying than to catch some stupid thief trying to make off with something and getting caught in the act. I never stole anything
Wal mart needs to keep someone at the door that is under the age of 75. Cuz I saw a woman push 3 TVs past the grandma working the door and never slow down. The old lady just kind of went ma'am, ma'am and then went looking for a manager. Of course the perps got away with 3 TVs while granny spent 10 minutes trying to find some help.
Reply
#13
gummies from the bulk candy area
"Golf requires goofy pants and a fat ass. You should talk to my neighbor the accountant. Probably a great golfer. Huge ass!"
Reply
#14
I stole the heart of my wonderful wife. I keep it in a jar in my office.

It's a good trade off for my nuts she keeps in her purse.

Actually, I have never knowingly stole anything.
Reply
#15
On Daytona Spring Break in the early 90s I made off with some beer banners that were hanging around the poolside hotel bar. Most of them were hung up on a mezzanine, so I had to climb up there (too drunk to remember how that happened) cut em and throw em down to my drunk friends. Ahh the good old days.
Reply
#16
when i was a kid, i went to a dentist that let his young patients pick a prize out of his closet after the cleaning. i stole an extra pog. except i didn't have any pockets. so i panicked and shoved it down the front of my underwear. they must have known something was up, because i was all red and sweaty and walking funny.

for a fricken pog.
Reply
#17
In 1988 I stole an Olympic flag from Seoul Korea. I still have it.
Go fuck yourself. Hard.
Reply
#18
Admin Wrote:In 1988 I stole an Olympic flag from Seoul Korea. I still have it.

Wow, that was bold!
Hey doc, do you know the address of that place?
Oh, you know, I do know the address. It's at the corner of go fuck yourself and buy a map!
Reply
#19
Admin Wrote:In 1988 I stole an Olympic flag from Seoul Korea. I still have it.

Way to capture the true spirit of the olympics...literally
Reply
#20
Admin Wrote:In 1988 I stole an Olympic flag from Seoul Korea. I still have it.

One hell of a capture the flag game!
Reply
#21
Titan ! Wrote:
Torque Wrote:In college, (of course), there was construction on the one main road and a huge caterpillar machine was left unlocked and I climbed in and took the guy's keychain (left the keys), a hustler, the one shift knob, and a whole roll of caution tape.

I think I love you.

but you're from PA so you probably have webbed toes

Don't be so shallow Titan, I can make up for 'em
Humans are not rational beings, they are rationalizing
Practice safe sex, do it in a Volvo ___________ "Shut up", he explained.
Reply
#22
My senior year, alot of us were involved after school in practice for the Senior Skit and in the auditorium where we were was a podium. I made sure that I was the last one to leave the building and I stuck the podium in the back of my Baby Blue 78' Pinto.

It was dark when I left and it isn't a problem getting out of St. Louis Michigan the back way, with out getting caught. I placed the podium in a cemetery about eight miles north of town. I knew it was on a main bus route so that when the bus drivers went by they would be like "WTF?" Then I went home.

At about midnight, I got a severe case of the "what ifs" and a extremely bad guilty conscience. I got back into my Pinto and stuck the podium in the hatch back and drove it back to school and stuck it in the parking lot. I rode the bus to school the next morning just to get the reaction of the kids on the bus and as far as I know, no one ever found out who did it.
"Sir, You need to get out of your car, there is a train comming."
"Why ummm... uhhh did you ummm... feel the need to errrrr, god why can't I type!!"
Reply
#23
Wow! I just realized I have Freebeer's massive lips!!
"Sir, You need to get out of your car, there is a train comming."
"Why ummm... uhhh did you ummm... feel the need to errrrr, god why can't I type!!"
Reply
#24
Torque Wrote:
Titan ! Wrote:I think I love you.

but you're from PA so you probably have webbed toes

Don't be so shallow Titan, I can make up for 'em

:o Promise ?
Wowie Groovie !
Reply
#25
I was at Wal Mart with my boyfriend and his friend picking up food for the evening. Our buddy went to go grab a bottle of ketchup. As he was figuring out which bottle to grab, a woman asked him why he would bother to BUY the ketchup when he could just go to the McDonald's inside the store and take packets.
Reply
#26
Titan ! Wrote:
potthole Wrote:Totally unrelated to this thread, but this post here reminded me of back when I was in high school, working at a Dick's Sporting Goods.

We had some dude steal a kyak. Walked right in, went straight to the second floor, grabbed the kyak, and walked right out with it. Even waved and said thanks to the cashiers as he went out the door.

Nobody really thought much at the time, because they figured he had paid for it already. It wasn't that uncommon to see somebody back their car or truck up to the door, to pick up a boat or other large item, so everybody just assumed that was the case again. Oops.

I'd call that testicular fortitude. A whole f'ing kayak ?

You're tellin' me. We didn't realize anything was astray until later that night when doing closing inventory. A check back through the security tapes showed the dude walking right out with it.

I was actually pretty shocked at how bold some people would get when it came to attempting to steal stuff from us.
Reply
#27
I used to steal shot glasses. I had a colelction of about 25 or so, but I haven't done that in a while.
Wowie Groovie !
Reply
#28
I like to steal stupid stuff. I always end up with the golf ball after playing mini-golf. I have a frog from a carnival game where you are supposed to send frogs flying into a bin. I have cue balls from numerous pool tables. I have the table tent holders from some cool bars. I have more than one "hot" glass in my bar including some very nice beer glasses.
I'm so goth, I shit bats.
Reply
#29
Titan ! Wrote:I used to steal shot glasses. I had a colelction of about 25 or so, but I haven't done that in a while.

Shot glasses? Pfft. My boyfriend steal beer mugs from bars.
That's what she said.
Reply
#30
Titan ! Wrote:I used to steal shot glasses. I had a colelction of about 25 or so, but I haven't done that in a while.

Mine are all paid for, but I have around 60 or 70 shot glasses. I guess everyone has to collect something. The funny thing is that I never use any of them. I have about four that I keep off display and use.....soooooo yeahhhhhhh
Reply
#31
I ah, no steal. However, my MIL works at Meijer (sans "s" for those purists) and told me that if I ever did want to steal, that I could do it there after 1:00 a.m. because security is gone and nobody watches the door. I know we have a lot of Meijer (sans "s" for those purists) employees here on the boards, anyone know if it's true that I can steal a plasma after security goes home?
“I wanna tell Y’all that I ain’t votin for nobody that don’t say freedom enough. Freedom ain’t free, Free Beer. We gotta fight for freedom, Hot wings. Zane you gotta eat freedom fries...Freedom, freedom, freedom, freedom..FREEDOM!"
Reply
#32
Wow. Um. That seems like big time felony. I'd not throw that idea out into a public forum. Just thinking.
Reply
#33
FUSTERCLUCK Wrote:I like to steal stupid stuff. I always end up with the golf ball after playing mini-golf. I have a frog from a carnival game where you are supposed to send frogs flying into a bin. I have cue balls from numerous pool tables. I have the table tent holders from some cool bars. I have more than one "hot" glass in my bar including some very nice beer glasses.

About two dozen baseballs from various on-field events at games...
Reply
#34
My wife called me as I was on my way home the other night to pick up some necessities (milk, bread, etc.) as I had a minor case of heartburn at the time, I picked up a three pack of tums. She called me again and asked me to pick up some ice cream as well (she's pregnant). As I was deciding on which ice cream to by, I unconciously put the Tums in my pocket. I then proceeded to the checkout, paid for my items, and headed home. After about 3 miles, I reached in my pocket for my lighter, and found the Tums...I forgot to pay for them.

Is that stealing, or stupidity?
Reply
#35
There are people out there that are living off dog food, having just enough money to buy tums for their dog food meals; AND YOUR STEALING TUMS? You should be ashamed Wink ;D ;D ;D
Reply
#36
potthole Wrote:
FUSTERCLUCK Wrote:I like to steal stupid stuff. I always end up with the golf ball after playing mini-golf. I have a frog from a carnival game where you are supposed to send frogs flying into a bin. I have cue balls from numerous pool tables. I have the table tent holders from some cool bars. I have more than one "hot" glass in my bar including some very nice beer glasses.

About two dozen baseballs from various on-field events at games...

those were gifts from players......
I'm so goth, I shit bats.
Reply
#37
FUSTERCLUCK Wrote:
potthole Wrote:About two dozen baseballs from various on-field events at games...

those were gifts from players......

*cough*FieldofDreamsNight*cough*
Reply
#38
Were any of them from Orlando?

*cue violin music*
Go fuck yourself. Hard.
Reply
#39
I steal boys' hearts.
That's what she said.
Reply


Forum Jump:


Users browsing this thread: 3 Guest(s)