Why the Colts will win the Superbowl

[Keyser Soze]

women with kids don't do it for me

[faceman802]

I'm sorry, the correct answer was "I don't take my cock out on paltalk anymore"

[Keyser Soze]

thats not entirely correct, i would but it doesn't run on macintosh

[faceman802]

thus endeth this discussion

[Keyser Soze]

for your limited imagination maybe

[Bloody Anus]

Well it’s official. I hate the fucking Superbowl and everything it stands for. It’s not even a sporting event anymore, it’s a television and entertainment spectacle. I didn’t watch a single second of pregame coverage for the entire two weeks. No ESPN, Sportscenter, NFL Live, nothing. The only thing I did see was about an hour or two before kickoff when I went next door and saw Katie Couric there with James Brown and whoever else was on. Then I went home and didn’t turn the TV on until 3:24. Why the hell would Katie Couric ever cover a fucking football game? That would be like Al Michaels doing a live report fom Iraq. The game has taken a backseat to the pregame bullshit, the halftime bullshit, and the advertising bullshit.

What makes matters worse is the bye week in between. It’s completely unnecessary and interrupts all the continuity from the playoffs and from the entire football watching experience. Do they really need an extra week to hype up the game? Anybody that actually watches football already knows what they need to about the teams and players involved. How many of these tired “human interest” stories can you broadcast before they all end up sounding exactly the same? And anybody that doesn’t watch football and doesn’t know about the teams and players shouldn’t be watching the Superbowl anyway. If you don’t like football, don’t watch football. The World Cup is a huge event, but since I don’t like soccer, I will never watch it. Simple.

The halftime show is way too long and equally unnecessary. The players and coaches are supposed to treat it as “any other game”, but that’s fuck near impossible when the continuity is interrupted not only between games but between halves! With about 12 minutes or so left in the half CBS and Jim Nantz announced “coming up next it’s the halftime show featuring Prince!” Who fucking cares! It’s a football game, not a fucking concert from 1987. Even during the game, they take attention away from the game and focus on all the extravaganza bullshit.

The whole craze over the new commercials is quite perplexing to me. With TiVo and DVR and all this new technology intended to fast forward through commercials or whatever you don’t want to watch, why all of a sudden are people so enthralled by these billion dollar companies’ new advertising campaigns? During any other sporting event or television show, you’d just fast forward through commercials or change the channel or take a piss or something. Oooh, but these are brand new commercials! Get fucked! 2 weeks from now they’ll either be old, overplayed commercials or cancelled commercials because it offended somebody in Kentucky. Besides, whether they’re new or not, they’re still COMMERCIALS. Nobody gives 2 flying assfucks about commercials 364 days a year, but now suddenly you can’t miss one? How in the fuck did the NFL and its sponsors manage to convince such an insane amount of Americans to actually look forward to commercials? That’s got to be one of the most brilliant bits of marketing that’s ever been done.

Of course, every sport needs to liven up and hype up its championship and include some extraordinary, albeit unnecessary, things here and there. But at least the World Series still feels like baseball. The NBA Finals still feels like you’re watching a basketball game. The Stanley Cup is still hockey. The Superbowl doesn’t even feel like a real football game anymore. As impractical as it is, I think the Superbowl should be played at whoever earned home field advantage. The rain was by far the best part of this Superbowl, but how cool would it be to have a Superbowl played in Chicago in freezing temperatures and lots of snow. That’s what earning home field advantage is all about. Not playing 2 home games then going somewhere neutral to play your most important game of the year.

I realize this is nothing new; that the Superbowl has been this way for quite a while. I’ve just reached the point where I’ve grown so disenchanted by the entertainment industry destroying football. One of the greatest Superbowls ever was played 3 years ago, but all anybody remembers it for is Janet Jackson.

[Goatweed]

I agree with every word. Bravo sir.

[diceisgod]

haha shittyheimer canned again. Worst coach eVAR!

[Bloody Anus]

Thus clinches San Diego winning the Superbowl next year.

2004 Steelers have best record in NFL, lose in playoffs
2005 Steelers win Superbowl
2005 Colts have best record in NFL, lose in playoffs
2006 Colts win Superbowl
2006 Chargers have best record in NFL, lose in playoffs
2007 Chargers are currently 6:1, probably was closer to 10 before the firing - or at least should have been

[Keyser Soze]

im with it

[diceisgod]

they should win if they don't hire another idiot for a head coach

[Keyser Soze]

jim fassel would be a good fit