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The Unofficial Opie & Anthony Message Board - Fuck College [Caution: Long and Rambling]


Displaying 1-17 of 17 messages in this thread.
Posted ByDiscussion Topic: Fuck College [Caution: Long and Rambling]
Sephiroth
posted on 08-28-2001 @ 3:31 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Dec. 00
I go down to my campus today to wrap up some loose ends concerning my enrollment at John Jay. Im a second year student, so i know my way around that place. I go to pick up my schedule of the classes i programmed in the middle of last fucking may. I walk up to the desk, expecting my scedule, and they tell me there is a problem with my registration. Appearently, the bursar office wants to see me before i register. "No Biggie" the slut behind the counter tells me.So i make my way to the other fucking building to the hosebag bursar's office.

I sit down in her office, and ask why i didnt recieve my schedule. "You owe us some money" the bitch tells me. How much? $50. "Thats nothing, i can pay that now" i say, as i hand her the money. "i can get my schedule now, correct?" I ask politely. "Well, there's a problem with that."

This is where everything goes wrong.

"Whats the problem?" i ask. "Well, when there is a debt to be paid, we freeze the account. This also freezes your registration." "But i already registered, im just picking up the schedule...." "Because there was a debt on the account, we did not process your registration."

Stage 1 alert.

"WHAT !?!?! I owed $50 bucks and you never registered mr?!? But i programmed my classes in the middle of May!! Why wasn't i told sooner !?!?" "Im sorry, you must have slipped thru the cracks" (This is the true test of my restraint, as i did not belt her one right then). "Well, i paid now. Did you at least hold my spaces in my classes?" "No, we were not allowed. It wouldnt be fair to the students with no balances." "So basically, i lost a semester full of classes and work over $50" "No, you can still do the late registration going on right now. It's not too late."

I pull myself away from my homocidal urges just long enough to RUN over to the other building for late registration. Then i see the line. Looks twice as long as the line to get Mets/Yankees World series tickets. I get the program of available classes and see if i can salvage this semester. Not one fucking class i need is open now.


Fuck College, and fuck College Administration. These fuckers had 4 fucking months to tell me i owed them $50, and didnt even fucking bother. Now i cant take ANY classes this semester, because i cant risk wasting any credits if i choose to pursue a minor. These ass-humping, cock-snorting, shit-licking mongoloids cant even pass basic fucking reading and writing tests, so they work in a goddamn college. I LOVE AMERICA SOMETIMES. If these fucking giant flaming festering shit covered puss filled cocksuckers can pull themselves away from their daily circle-jerk with the cute intern who always gets drunk at the office party for 3 goddamn minutes, some work might actually get done. ::GASP:: I dont want to hear about you and your 9 children, i dont want to hear that Johnathan left Maria on "Days of our lives".. i just want to hear your pudgy little fingers tapping away on your keyboard getting MY shit in order. Sweet Slippery Neon Chocolatey Jesus BJ Christ Allmighty On A Fucking Nuclear Powered Chrome Pogo stick... how hard is your fucking job? A retarded lab monkey who masturbaes 15 times a hour could do it TWICE as fast as you !!! You want to blame me for this shit?! IF YOU BLAME ANYONE, BLAME GOD, OR ALLAH OR JESUS OR VISHNU OR WHO EVER THE FUCK YOU THINKS GIVES 2 FLAMING FLYING FUCKS AT A SLIPPERY ROLLING DONUT ABOUT YOUR STUMPY ASS. Because of you fucking idiots, i got to wait until the Spring to get back in, and lose all the time doing Nothing at all. And, there's a good possibilty that i will have to be in college for 5 fucking years because the classes for my major arent offered during the summer.I never wished Death upon anybody ever, so feel honored. And people wonder why Kids shoot up their schools.

Alright. I think i feel better.



Here is my Email Address. Here is my IM name. It's there for a reason. Please use it. Oh god, I'm so lonely...........


spitfire421
posted on 08-28-2001 @ 3:35 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Dec. 00
Ahhh, the memories....thanks for reminding me that I don't have to go through all that bullshit ever again...:)

Seph, you should try to talk to the profs of the classes you want to take, tell them your situation, and you may be able to get signed into at least some of their classes



Hey I'd like to daze away to a place like no one has known
In a state of mind I could call mine that only I could own
Where I could hum a tune anytime I choose, and then there's no such thing as time
Where I can feel no pain just calm and sane what a place for one to find

Lord Duvious
posted on 08-28-2001 @ 3:41 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Jul. 01
I know you're pissed Seph, but feel lucky you even have the luxury of waiting one semester. I blew a half tuition scholarship to one of the top 5 (TOP 5!) communications schools in the country. Want to trade places?



Email Me

It takes a lot of work to get this cynical.

You can get a pretty good look at a t-bone by sticking your head up a bull's ass, but wouldn't you rather take the butcher's word for it?
Tequila
Fez claims this land in the name of Portugal!
Why worry about the train if it never makes it around the tracks?? IrishAlkey wuz here!!!
posted on 08-28-2001 @ 3:47 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Jan. 01
Hey look on the bright side you can have her job when you miss this semester.;)


ACCEPTING ADOPTION APPLICATIONS CLICK BELOW
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Arpikarhu
Harmless Teddy I wish Maynard was still posting here so I could implant my head up his ass.
Needle dick, bear salesman. I think I'm a revolutionary. Actually, I'm a one trick pony.
I enjoy C&BT
posted on 08-28-2001 @ 4:10 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Apr. 01
i love it when people tell you they fucked up but
you have to live with the consequences. how about making good on your mistake instead of passing the crap along to me. i totally feel for you dude.
i gree with spitfire. usually if you go to the profs of the class you want they will let you in.
good luck

Arpi Karhu Kauppias Forever!!!


AIM- Arpikarhu

Sloatsburgh
posted on 08-28-2001 @ 4:24 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Oct. 00
Well, Seph, the problem is that the University need extra funds to send the letter to East Asia, then, because it was in the wrong alphabet, it took time to translate, finally, the mail department is using antiquated systems of transportation. If I'm not mistaken, mail only gets delivered to your village twice a year, and this letter just missed the donkey.

Ah well, the more time you can spend watching anime...??





No, that truly truly sucks. I would find a friend in administration..... maybe a letter to the Vice Dean....







42
CriticsLoveSnatch
i know better than to ask for a status from you mean ol' mods
Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag Emo Fag
I shall call him mini-FTL
posted on 08-28-2001 @ 7:09 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Oct. 00
damn seph that sucks...looks like i got lots of fun with the registrar's office ahead of me

but.....

quote:

ass-humping, cock-snorting, shit-licking mongoloids

quote:

Sweet Slippery Neon Chocolatey Jesus BJ Christ Allmighty On A Fucking Nuclear Powered Chrome Pogo stick

quote:

A retarded lab monkey who masturbaes 15 times a hour could do it TWICE as fast as you !!


god damn those are some of the funniest lines i have seen anywhere...bra-fuckin-vo



My adopted Mini-critic is drusilla.
Anyone else wanting to be adopted IM me at Jemo123


"Why are the pretty ones always insane?" - Chief Wiggum
Is Don on the phone?
posted on 08-28-2001 @ 7:32 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Jan. 01
As JJC alumni (Class of '94 and yes, 4.5 years) I can concur-the Bursar/Registrar's offices have taken bureaucratic ineptitude to new heights. Ironic that the school that beat Harvard for best Masters in Public Administration (Criminal Justice) program has some serious administrative problems.

I remember it like it was yesterday, walking around the gym in the new building (have they named it anything yet? Maybe Misery Hall, or the Soviet Union Breadline Building?), waiting in line for 6 to 8 hours to get the four classes I couldn't get for FOUR FUCKING YEARS in a fall semester that I should have been in the working world for.

Just wait till they hit you for dough after graduation....

Have you considered a semester of Thematic Studies? You can charge the classes to your major in some cases, and you usually end up with coeds from Baruch or Hunter. NICE!


AIM:isdononthephone
F the S out of her A
posted on 08-28-2001 @ 7:40 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Jun. 01
I just hopped into here to send an FU to co-Kean University for similar administrative incompetence.

It is ironic that the sloppy f-tards deemed too stoopid for the DMV get offered jobs INSTANTANEOUSLY at the first college they walk into... of course, they could get better money at a McDonald's.

My beef was that I was approved for financial aid eight weeks prior to my dropping into the office to ask the status of my application. Since I was a non-matriculated student (guest from another college), I was limited to only so many credit hours. However, I was approved by co-Kean, which meant I would have to matriculate (become a student of Kean).

Well, I had to go to two colleges and my old high school to pick up and hand-deliver transcripts to expedite the transfer. Despite showing up to campus several days a week and insisting they take care of my transfer because of the special circumstances (31 year-old returning student who holds an A average for 9 credits at Kean so far), they STILL managed not to complete my transfer on Monday, the day I was alotted to register.

And then, I learn that I automatically lose 18 credits because of my transfer, which is still not complete.

Seph, I am pulling rank and finding whatever Dean or president that will make things right where financial aid, transfers and other people have totally fucked up.

I want to be published and earning royalties this time next year, not taking and extra fucking semester because no one took the time to answer my questions or handle my situation.

That whole reference made about how they admit fucking up, but leave you dealing with the consequences of THEIR mistake is so fucking true. I philosophized in one of the long lines I was standing in yesterday that the university just tries and tries to find your breaking point.

Seph, don't let them break you... this is a real-life test, and you should go to the professors, the deans and everyone else. The squeaky wheel gets the grease, so make a lot of fucking noise, because professors and deans know how fucking stupid the administration is... rememeber, they are basically McDonald's assistant managers at best, so don't let them fuck up your future.

As for me, I got good news today: my financial aid award will cover those over-priced books as well. When I got my book voucher at the bursar's office, however, I learned I have to wait until the semester starts next week to buy my books. Fuck them hard and dry!

"You take tuberculosis - my smoking doesn't go over there at all."
WookiePoolParty
posted on 08-28-2001 @ 8:15 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Mar. 01
While certainly not on the same level of importance, the ineptitude is the same:

about 5 or 6 months after I graduated, I was curious why I hadn't recieved my diploma yet- Grnadma wanted to see it. So I called up, only to find out I owed them money. Which was weird, I thought, because I thought that I had paid all my bills, and hadn't recieved any notices about it over those 6 months.
Bottom line, how much did I owe them?

39 cents.

So I went and paid with nickels and pennies.


Help those that need it. Join IBC.

WPP's Swiller Beer Pick of the Week:
Magic Hat Number Nine
Ashley the Goer
posted on 08-28-2001 @ 8:45 PM      
Hanger-On
Registered: Aug. 01
Wookie-
I was in a similar situation, only I owed the campus library $3.25. I, however, did not choose as high a road as you. I paid in pennies only, no nickels!!
Mr. Brownstone
posted on 08-28-2001 @ 9:06 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Dec. 00
Appeal to the dean of students ASAP.




Two openings available at Mr. Brownstone Academy of Dance .


I see stupid people...They're everywhere...They don't know they're stupid...
DR. Buster Hymen
posted on 08-28-2001 @ 9:08 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Oct. 00
Hey Seph,
Shitty situation. But you do have options.

First, I would make an appt. ASAP with your School's Dean. Don't take no for an answer. Be Professional; wear at least a shirt & tie, if not a suit. Calmly explain the situation; see if he/she is willing to help. If not, you may need to get slightly forceful, but stay professional.

If the Dean won't see or help you, then you need to utilize your secret weapon-Parents. They are viewed as THE CUSTOMER. Unfortunately, most schools still see their students as children-even though YOU may be the one paying. Forceful parents can usually get to speak with more top people and get faster problem resolution than a student can.

I went through a number of problems at Boston University-a BIG bureacratic instition. Whenever I couldn't resolve a problem(even over weeks), I'd call my Dad, and have the problem solved within 1-3 days!

But remember, you will have the last laugh. When I was first hit for money from the school, I was able to get right through to the Dean of Alumni, and I voiced the complaints that I had pent up over the years. It felt GREAT!!!

In addition, speaking with the Profs. is also another good suggestion.

GOOD LUCK!!!

DOC Buster

DR. Buster Hymen
"Spread Your Legs & Say Aahhh"
[email protected]
Froy
King Shit
*board owner*

posted on 08-28-2001 @ 10:21 PM      
O&A Board Veteran
Registered: Feb. 01
Seph, talk to your adviser, usually he can write you into closed classes that are in your major.


Is my train in vain, has my soul gone to waste
Am I just a victim of, a victim of my lost faith
Lent
Black Rock Coalition
Do you have a basketball in your car?
posted on 08-29-2001 @ 12:04 AM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: May. 00
I thought a name like John Jay would do better than that.

As stated in eariler message you must be a bug on the administration's ass. It's funny that every school is like this. No matter how good they claim to be there will be one department that will screw things up.

Hopefully things will work out for you. At least you have time to work or listen to O&A. ;) A lot of people finish school in 5 years. Maybe you can take some of the required courses in the summer or at another university if John Jay will let you.



--Lent, the poster formerly known as Rowelentless--


2 Slots (huh huh I said slots) are now open in the LENT's school of enlightenment.

LET'S GO RED STORM!
Sloatsburgh
posted on 08-29-2001 @ 1:34 AM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Oct. 00
quote:

Seph, talk to your adviser, usually he can write you into closed classes that are in your major.


How would a 13, no wait, a 14 year old in Junior High know that?







42
BawxedWine
posted on 08-30-2001 @ 6:57 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Jun. 01
Seph, are you the one who stabbed that dean Tuesday morning? The shocking part of that is that I was in class all day and didn't know a thing about it.


Girls get moist for the Chevy Blazer.



Displaying 1-17 of 17 messages in this thread.