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Displaying 1-13 of 13 messages in this thread. |
| Posted By | Discussion Topic: I think there's a little wang to this punch | ||||
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| The Painter 1/2 a bottle of Jack Daniels... it's a cure-all | posted on 09-30-2001 @ 10:06 AM |    | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Sep. 00  | Man finds human penis in bottle of fruit punch Police don't know if crime is involved By Tillie Fong, News Staff Writer COMMERCE CITY -- Police say a man found a penis Thursday in a bottled drink he purchased at a grocery store. "For us, it's a mystery," said Elaine Rowe, spokeswoman for Commerce City police. "We don't know if there is a crime involved. This could be a fraud, mutilation or attempted homicide." Thursday morning, Juan Sanchez-Marchez, 41, a machine operator at Foothills Mail and Supply, was at work, taking his usual sips from a 20-ounce bottle of Ora Potency Fruit Punch. After he had downed about two-thirds of the bottle, he found something in the opaque red drink. He called over his 16-year-old son, Manuel, who also works at the shop. His boss told him that it looked like a penis and to report it to the police. A pathologist with the Adams County coroner's office determined it was a 3-inch segment of human penis. It was cleanly cut at the base. Authorities do not know whether the body part came from an adult or juvenile, or whether it had been taken from a cadaver or a living person. A DNA test will be conducted on the penis, in case it may be related to an ongoing Adams County investigation where various body parts, including a head and part of a leg, have been found but not identified. The Ora Potency Fruit Punch comes in a clear glass bottle with a label. Sanchez-Marchez said the top was intact when he opened it. "It's a very hard top to get off," he said. Police do not believe that Sanchez-Marchez put the penis in the bottle. "He's a very credible witness," Rowe said. The drink was purchased Wednesday from the King Soopers at 6040 E. 65th Ave. Sanchez-Marchez bought six bottles. Nothing was found in the others. The product has been taken off the shelves at the store and from other King Soopers in the metro area. A King Soopers spokesperson could not be reached for comment late Friday. Rowe said the drink was dated at least a year ago and was bottled at a plant in Pittsburgh. "They said there was no way it could have occurred there," she said. "It's a mystery where it came from and how it got into this bottle." September 29, 2001 __________________________________________________ OK, He drank 2/3's of the bottle. Does that make him gay?  This message was edited by The Painter on 9-30-01 @ 10:58 AM | ||||
| squidink | posted on 09-30-2001 @ 10:12 AM | | |||
| Psychopath Registered: Feb. 01 | That depends, did he swallow or spit???????.jpg) | ||||
| LunaBabe Ok, I know this is all a ploy, but, I'll play anyway. Dylan? BAH! I've heard BETTER! JYD-4-LIFE 'Shrooomer | posted on 09-30-2001 @ 10:20 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Jun. 01 | Is Loraine Bobbit working at a bottled drink co. now? Suidink...like the sig!;-)  This message was edited by LunaBabe on 9-30-01 @ 8:45 PM | ||||
| IkeaBoy P.L.F. Portugese Liberation Front- Liberating Status' everywhere from the Tyranny of Portugal I will die a traitor's death | posted on 09-30-2001 @ 10:22 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Veteran Registered: Sep. 00 | How about a nice Hawaiian slice off your penis "I didn't realize how tragic it [the WTC attack] was until the celebrities told me"- Ron Bennington | ||||
| onehung lo434 | posted on 09-30-2001 @ 10:37 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Oct. 00 | Gives A whole new meaning to "message in a bottle" ..Its kinda funny that he had to call his son over.He couldn't tell it was a cock himself?!  | ||||
| mrbungle | posted on 09-30-2001 @ 10:44 AM | | |||
| Psychopath Registered: Mar. 01 | quote: I guess penis never expires, huh? The human wang is a beautiful thing.-Homer Jay Simpson  It's not funny, my ass is on fire.... Thanks to the lovely Jolene for my sig pic... Douche or dressing? Yeahhh!!! | ||||
| Joe Soprano | posted on 09-30-2001 @ 6:10 PM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Sep. 00 | I'd hate to find out if they come in six-packs! OUCH! Kiss me helmet. | ||||
The sky is blue | posted on 09-30-2001 @ 6:18 PM | | |||
| O&A Board Veteran Registered: Oct. 00 | I'm not gay, my boyfriends severed penis is. Wanna be the coolest kid on your block? Get an 'I love Froy t-shirt!' Add it to your sig today! Email me at [email protected] | ||||
| Jennitalia | posted on 09-30-2001 @ 6:46 PM | | |||
| Psychopath Registered: Sep. 00 | dammit! i can't believe they finally found it "Like, Mother, it's my life ok...so if i want to live on a beach and walk around naked..." | ||||
| Filzy Stand up straight Stomach in Shoulders back SOUND OFF!!! | posted on 09-30-2001 @ 8:53 PM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Sep. 00 | Good Hollywood Knights refernce, Painter. There are 3 types of leaders and heroes. Some are born leaders, some are built from the ground up by experience, and some are the right people at the right time. Now accepting two recruits for the revived Armored Division. | ||||
| The Painter 1/2 a bottle of Jack Daniels... it's a cure-all | posted on 09-30-2001 @ 9:10 PM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Sep. 00 | quote:I was hoping someone would get it. | ||||
| Joe Soprano | posted on 09-30-2001 @ 9:20 PM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Sep. 00 | Speaking of HK references... "Did you hear about the guy with five penises? His pants fit like a glove!" Kiss me helmet. | ||||
| Drunken GW I Pissed on a Church to get this Status. | posted on 10-02-2001 @ 9:35 AM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Dec. 00 | One question for Juan...Does it taste like chicken? If your parents never had children, chances are you won't either. | ||||
Displaying 1-13 of 13 messages in this thread. |