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The Unofficial Opie & Anthony Message Board - Really funny news item about an excessively fat woman

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Posted ByDiscussion Topic: Really funny news item about an excessively fat woman
TeenWeek
what's a status? 		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 12:28 PM      
O&A Board Regular
Registered: Oct. 00
quote:
An Oregon woman who lost 800 pounds underwent an operation for the final touch - to remove 110 pounds of lap that hung down to her shins.

Previously, Jeannette Standard of Pendleton had to use a footstool to prop up her drooping belly.

"I had to lift it to clean under it. And I would have to lay on the bed and have my daughter dry me off," said Standard.

"But the skin was breaking down anyway. It had cracks that were open and bleeding. And the smell was atrocious."

The surgery cost more than $50,000.

Standard's doctor, Kent Walker, said "fat aprons" are common in people who have lost extensive amounts of weight.

"Imagine trying to get around with a 110-pound belly pack. That's an amazing amount of weight," he said.

Five-foot-2 Jeannette now weighs a mere - ahem - 435 pounds.


My favorite line of the article is that she needs a footstool to prop up her fat stomach. If you are this fat, the only thing you should put in your mouth is a shotgun.



Syndrummer
LOOK!! All my "N"s are capitalized!!!		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 12:35 PM      
Psychopath
Registered: Mar. 02
Lets do some math: She lost 800 Lbs
then she had 110 Lbs cut off
Now she weighs 435 Lbs
_________
that means she was orig. 1345 Lbs



HOLY SHIT





    • Rookie
    Have you ever seen a grown man naked?
    Stature of an Oompa Loompa!
    JBA's Stalker.
    Post Whore One Week, Fart In The Wind The Next
    		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 12:38 PM      
    O&A Board Regular
    Registered: Jan. 01
    		435 = current weight
    110 = rotting fat apron that was removed
    800 = pounds she lost
    1345 = weight before diet. And this is on a 5'2" body. How the fuck did she move???

    EDIT -- You suck Syndrummer. :-p


    I love you all. I love you more than life itself... But you're all fucking mad.



    This message was edited by Rookie on 4-18-02 @ 12:40 PM
    Joey BigArms
    I Need An Old Priest And A Young Priest    		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 12:42 PM      
    O&A Board Regular
    Registered: Oct. 00
    		I would still throw her one.


    opieanthony.com; Like a retarded yoyo, you will keep coming back.
    "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times" Charles Dickens
    Over The Limit
    goatweed
    I've Got A Vagina With Teeth.
    G.O.O.F.B.A.H.G.S.
    Dragoon Battalion
    My friends call me Weed     		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 1:04 PM      
    O&A Board Regular
    Registered: Jan. 01
    quote:
    "But the skin was breaking down anyway. It had cracks that were open and bleeding. And the smell was atrocious."
    Just what I needed to read before I head out on my luncg break... :eek:

    On the bright side - it's people like this that make me look beanstalk-thin :-D


    The line between fantasy and reality is the same as that between sanity and insanity...which side of the line are you on?


    You can reach me through AIM or email. Feel free to contact me if you have any board questions, techie (PC) questions, or even if you just wanna chat and be bestest of friends.

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    scmods
    Break into my dad's pc and go to the porno directory. It takes a lot to freak me out, and his archive can do it. Time & Time Again.
    		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 1:05 PM      
    Psychopath
    Registered: Feb. 01
    		That certainly one big bunt!



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    Syndrummer
    LOOK!! All my "N"s are capitalized!!!    		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 1:05 PM      
    Psychopath
    Registered: Mar. 02
    quote:
    EDIT -- You suck Syndrummer


    I know the feeling. I started a new thread at the same time as Froy once, and even though mine posted first all the responses were very negative towards me.
    quote:
    I was Very offended


    Beans Malone
    		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 1:10 PM      
    Psychopath
    Registered: Mar. 02
    		You know fat ones make the best lovers so she must be great..I wonder if she's seeing anyone :-p


    Murder By Numbers Showtimes 1:30, 3:45, 5:55, 8:10, 10:10, 12:10.
    goatweed
    I've Got A Vagina With Teeth.
    G.O.O.F.B.A.H.G.S.
    Dragoon Battalion
    My friends call me Weed     		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 1:15 PM      
    O&A Board Regular
    Registered: Jan. 01
    		If her skin was that bad, can you imagine what her hole smelled like?


    The line between fantasy and reality is the same as that between sanity and insanity...which side of the line are you on?


    You can reach me through AIM or email. Feel free to contact me if you have any board questions, techie (PC) questions, or even if you just wanna chat and be bestest of friends.

    Sorry, you are not an instant winner. Please try again.


    Joey BigArms
    I Need An Old Priest And A Young Priest    		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 1:17 PM      
    O&A Board Regular
    Registered: Oct. 00
    		Guys, I am sorry I might have to lock this thread. Grumpy did not realize his mother made the news.


    opieanthony.com; Like a retarded yoyo, you will keep coming back.
    "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times" Charles Dickens
    Over The Limit
    TeenWeek
    what's a status?     		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 1:18 PM      
    O&A Board Regular
    Registered: Oct. 00
    quote:
    "I had to lift it to clean under it. And I would have to lay on the bed and have my daughter dry me off," said Standard


    Worst job in the world, anyone?

    scmods
    Break into my dad's pc and go to the porno directory. It takes a lot to freak me out, and his archive can do it. Time & Time Again.
    		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 1:23 PM      
    Psychopath
    Registered: Feb. 01
    		Did the daughter at least get to use a leaf blower from a distance?

    Would the flapping of fat in the breeze make the hot, delicious stench from the white underbelly waft through the neighborhood? yechh



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    Colonel Will Bill
    O&A's only Dallas listener    		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 1:52 PM      
    Psychopath
    Registered: Jan. 01
    		just look at it this way, whenever you take her to the club to dance you only have to slap her ass once and it will shake for the rest of the night


    I'm as confused as a breastfeeding kid in a strip club
    IkeaBoy
    P.L.F.
    Portugese Liberation Front- Liberating Status' everywhere from the Tyranny of Portugal
    I will die a traitor's death    		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 1:57 PM      
    O&A Board Veteran
    Registered: Sep. 00
    quote:
    "I had to lift it to clean under it. And I would have to lay on the bed and have my daughter dry me off," said Standard.
    I have never felt bad for anyone before. I do now. Why can't she just wash herself with a rag on a stick like cultured fat people do.



    "It appears my wee wee has been strucken with rigor mortis."
    Thursday April 18- CBS: Survivor, CSI (R), Agenct...NBC: Friends (R), Friends (R), Grace, Shoot, ER (R)...FOX: 8- FAMILY GUY (ALLEGEDLY THE EPISODE WITH THE BIN LADEN REFERENCE, LET'S SEE IF IT'S REMOVED), Greg theBunny, King (R), King (R)...ABC: Line(R), Line (R), Millionare...UPN: Smackdown...WB: Gilmore (R), Charmed...TNT: The Mummy...SCIFI: 9- Halloween 2...TBS: DUmb and Dumber...
    Rookie
    Have you ever seen a grown man naked?
    Stature of an Oompa Loompa!
    JBA's Stalker.
    Post Whore One Week, Fart In The Wind The Next
    		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 2:09 PM      
    O&A Board Regular
    Registered: Jan. 01
    Rookie
    Have you ever seen a grown man naked?
    Stature of an Oompa Loompa!
    JBA's Stalker.
    Post Whore One Week, Fart In The Wind The Next
    		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 2:10 PM      
    O&A Board Regular
    Registered: Jan. 01
    Rookie
    Have you ever seen a grown man naked?
    Stature of an Oompa Loompa!
    JBA's Stalker.
    Post Whore One Week, Fart In The Wind The Next
    		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 2:11 PM      
    O&A Board Regular
    Registered: Jan. 01


    This message was edited by Rookie on 4-18-02 @ 2:12 PM
    TeenWeek
    what's a status?     		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 2:12 PM      
    O&A Board Regular
    Registered: Oct. 00
    		I think those women might make up her leg. Definitely not fat enough for 1300 lbs.

    PlasticMan
    G.O.O.F.B.A.H.G.S.
    Dhalsim-Style Hand to Hand Specialist    		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 2:12 PM      
    Psychopath
    Registered: Mar. 02
    quote:
    Would the flapping of fat in the breeze make the hot, delicious stench from the white underbelly waft through the neighborhood?
    Oh, god, please stop. I think I'm gonna hurl!

    PS - I live in Oregon, though thankfully far away from Pendleton. An interesting note: Pendleton is known for their anual rodeo, "The Pendleton Roundup." I'll leave the livestock jokes unsaid.

    ..
    It wasn't lies, it was just...bullshit.
    TeenWeek
    what's a status?     		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 2:24 PM      
    O&A Board Regular
    Registered: Oct. 00


    This woman was 1600 lbs and died in 1994. For those who's eyes are no hurting and want to rip them out, please look below.



    This message was edited by TeenWeek on 4-18-02 @ 2:32 PM
    JackDan1974
    		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 2:30 PM      
    O&A Board Regular
    Registered: Jul. 01
    quote:
    Five-foot-2 Jeannette now weighs a mere - ahem - 435 pounds.


    A mere 435 pounds, I do not know about anyone else but 435lb she still a freaking house. She should have had them suck some more fat when they cut off her vagina curtain.





    This message was edited by JackDan1974 on 4-18-02 @ 6:10 PM
    scmods
    Break into my dad's pc and go to the porno directory. It takes a lot to freak me out, and his archive can do it. Time & Time Again.
    		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 2:32 PM      
    Psychopath
    Registered: Feb. 01
    		Teen: thanks for at least having a sig to releive the pain. Knowing all I have to do is scroll a little more makes dealing with your findings easier!



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    TeenWeek
    what's a status?     		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 2:38 PM      
    O&A Board Regular
    Registered: Oct. 00
    		The 2 girls in my sig pic probably dont even way as much as one of her arms.

    Rookie
    Have you ever seen a grown man naked?
    Stature of an Oompa Loompa!
    JBA's Stalker.
    Post Whore One Week, Fart In The Wind The Next
    		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 2:39 PM      
    O&A Board Regular
    Registered: Jan. 01
    quote:


    Now that's HOT.



    I love you all. I love you more than life itself... But you're all fucking mad.

    scmods
    Break into my dad's pc and go to the porno directory. It takes a lot to freak me out, and his archive can do it. Time & Time Again.
    		posted on 04-18-2002 @ 3:00 PM      
    Psychopath
    Registered: Feb. 01
    		Where are her ankles?



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