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| Posted By | Discussion Topic: i know alot of you's dont like him but..... | ||||
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| mikeWOW | posted on 06-24-2001 @ 6:14 PM |    | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Sep. 00  | i wanted to kick some old school eminem.... My Name Is Chorus: repeat 2X Hi! My name is.. (what?) My name is.. (who?) My name is.. {scratches} Slim Shady Hi! My name is.. (huh?) My name is.. (what?) My name is.. {scratches} Slim Shady Ahem.. excuse me! Can I have the attention of the class for one second? [Eminem] Hi kids! Do you like violence? (Yeah yeah yeah!) Wanna see me stick Nine Inch Nails through each one of my eyelids? (Uh-huh!) Wanna copy me and do exactly like I did? (Yeah yeah!) Try 'cid and get fucked up worse that my life is? (Huh?) My brain's dead weight, I'm tryin to get my head straight but I can't figure out which Spice Girl I want to impregnate (Ummmm..) And Dr. Dre said, "Slim Shady you a basehead!" Uh-uhhh! "So why's your face red? Man you wasted!" Well since age twelve, I've felt like I'm someone else Cause I hung my original self from the top bunk with a belt Got pissed off and ripped Pamela Lee's tits off And smacked her so hard I knocked her clothes backwards like Kris Kross I smoke a fat pound of grass and fall on my ass faster than a fat bitch who sat down too fast C'mere slut! (Shady, wait a minute, that's my girl dog!) I don't give a fuck, God sent me to piss the world off! Chorus [Eminem] My English teacher wanted to flunk me in junior high Thanks a lot, next semester I'll be thirty-five I smacked him in his face with an eraser, chased him with a stapler and stapled his nuts to a stack of paper (Owwwwwwww!) Walked in the strip club, had my jacket zipped up Flashed the bartender, then stuck my dick in the tip cup Extraterrestrial, runnin over pedestrians in a spaceship while they screamin: "LET'S JUST BE FRIENDS!" Ninety-nine percent of my life I was lied to I just found out my mom does more dope than I do (Damn!) I told her I'd grow up to be a famous rapper Make a record about doin drugs and name it after her (Oh thank you!) You know you blew up when the women rush your stands and try to touch your hands like some screamin Usher fans (Aaahhhhhh!) This guy at White Castle asked for my autograph (Dude, can I get your autograph?) So I signed it: 'Dear Dave, thanks for the support, ASSHOLE!' Chorus [Eminem] Stop the tape! This kid needs to be locked away! (Get him!) Dr. Dre, don't just stand there, OPERATE! I'm not ready to leave, it's too scary to die (Fuck that!) I'll have to be carried inside the cemetery and buried alive (Huh yup!) Am I comin or goin? I can barely decide I just drank a fifth of vodka -- dare me to drive? (Go ahead) All my life I was very deprived I ain't had a woman in years, and my palms are too hairy to hide (Whoops!) Clothes ripped like the Incredible Hulk (hachhh-too) I spit when I talk, I'll fuck anything that walks (C'mere) When I was little I used to get so hungry I would throw fits HOW YOU GONNA BREAST FEED ME MOM? (WAH!) YOU AIN'T GOT NO TITS! (WAHHH!) I lay awake and strap myself in the bed Put a bulleproof vest on and shoot myself in the head (BANG!) I'm steamin mad (Arrrggghhh!) And by the way when you see my dad? (Yeah?) Tell him that I slit his throat, in this dream I had "i hate people that dont get it!" | ||||
| Mr. Brownstone | posted on 06-24-2001 @ 6:46 PM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Dec. 00 |  '97 BONNIE AND CLYDE Just the two of us.. (8X) Baby your da-da loves you (hey) And I'ma always be here for you (hey) no matter what happens You're all I got in this world I would never give you up for nothin Nobody in this world is ever gonna keep you from me I love you C'mon Hai-Hai, we goin to the beach Grab a couple of toys and let da-da strap you in the car seat Oh where's mama? She's takin a little nap in the trunk Oh that smell (whew!) da-da musta runned over a skunk Now I know what you're thinkin - it's kind of late to go swimmin But you know your mama, she's one of those type of women that do crazy things, and if she don't get her way, she'll throw a fit Don't play with da-da's toy knife, honey, let go of it (no!) And don't look so upset, why you actin bashful? Don't you wanna help da-da build a sand castle? (yeah!) And mama said she wants to show how far she can float And don't worry about that little boo-boo on her throat It's just a little scratch - it don't hurt, her was eatin dinner while you were sweepin and spilled ketchup on her shirt Mama's messy isn't she? We'll let her wash off in the water and me and you can pway by ourselves, can't we? Just the two of us.. (2X) And when we ride! Just the two of us.. (2X) Just you and I! Just the two of us.. (2X) And when we ride! Just the two of us.. (2X) Just you and I! See honey.. there's a place called heaven and a place called hell A place called prison and a place called jail And da-da's probably on his way to all of em except one Cause mama's got a new husband and a stepson And you don't want a brother do ya? (Nah) Maybe when you're old enough to understand a little better I'll explain it to ya But for now we'll just say mama was real real bad She was bein mean to dad and made him real real mad But I still feel sad that I put her on time-out Sit back in your chair honey, quit tryin to climb out (WAHH!) I told you it's okay HaiHai, wanna ba-ba? Take a night-night? Nan-a-boo, goo-goo ga-ga? Her make goo-goo ca-ca? Da-da change your dia-dee Clean the baby up so her can take a nighty-nighty Your dad'll wake her up as soon as we get to the water Ninety-seven Bonnie and Clyde, me and my daughter Just the two of us.. (2X) And when we ride! Just the two of us.. (2X) Just you and I! Just the two of us.. (2X) And when we ride! Just the two of us.. (2X) Just you and I! Wake up sweepy head we're here, before we pway we're gonna take mama for a wittle walk along the pier Baby, don't cry honey, don't get the wrong idea Mama's too sweepy to hear you screamin in her ear (ma-maa!) That's why you can't get her to wake, but don't worry Da-da made a nice bed for mommy at the bottom of the lake Here, you wanna help da-da tie a rope around this rock? (yeah!) We'll tie it to her footsie then we'll roll her off the dock Ready now, here we go, on the count of free.. One.. two.. free.. WHEEEEEE! (whoooooshhhhh) There goes mama, spwashin in the wa-ta No more fightin wit dad, no more restraining order No more step-da-da, no more new brother Blow her kisses bye-bye, tell mama you love her (mommy!) Now we'll go play in the sand, build a castle and junk But first, just help dad with two more things out the trunk Just the two of us.. (2X) And when we ride! Just the two of us.. (2X) Just you and I! Just the two of us.. (2X) And when we ride! Just the two of us.. (2X) Just you and I! Just the two of us.. (4X) Just me and you baby is all we need in this world Just me and you Your da-da will always be there for you Your da-da's always gonna love you Remember that If you ever need me I will always be here for you If you ever need anything, just ASK Da-da will be right there Your da-da loves you I love you baby  There is a theory which states that if anyone discovers exactly what the universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another which staes this has already happened. ---Douglas Adams Now seeking junior Brownstones to adopt | ||||
| Kim | posted on 06-24-2001 @ 7:56 PM | | |||
| O&A Board Regular Registered: Jan. 01 | Whatever Dre just let it run Ay yo turn the beat up a little bit Ay yo, this song is for anyone Fuck it just shut up and listen Ay yo I sit back with this pack of zigzags And this bag of this weed It gives me the shit needed to be The most meanest emcee on this - on this earth Cause since birth I've been cursed with this curse to just cursed And just blurt this bezerk and bizarre shit that works And it sells and it helps in its self To relieve all this tension dispensing me Sentence is getting it, stress has been eating me recently All through this chest and I rest to get peacefully But at least have the decency in you to leave me alone When you freaks see me out in the streets when I'm eating or feedin' my daughter To not come and speak to me I don't know you and no I don't owe you a motherfuckin thing I'm not Mr. NSYNC and I'm not what your friends think I'm not Mr. Friendly I can be a prick, if you tip me my tank is on empty No patience is in me and if you offend me I'm lifting you ten feet In the air, I don't care who was there and who saw me just jaw you Go call you a lawyer file you a lawsuit I'll smile in the courtroom and buy you a wardrobe I'm tired of arguing - I don't mean to mean but it's all I can be It's just me And I am Whatever you say I am If I wasn't, then why would I say I am? In the papers, the news, everyday I am Radio won't even play my jam Cause I am Whatever you say I am If I wasn't, then why would I say I am? In the papers, the news, everyday I am I don't know it's just the way I am Sometimes I just feel like my father, I hate to be bothered With all of this nonsense it's constant And "oh it's just lyrical content!" The song "Guilty Conscience" has gotten such rotten responses And all of this controversy circles me And it seems like the media immediately points a finger at me So I point one back at 'em But not the index or the pinky or the ring or the thumb It's the one you put up when you don't give a fuck When you won't just put up with the bullshit they pull Cause they full of shit too When a dude's gettin bullied and shoots up your school And they blame it on Marilyn - and the heroin Where were the parents at? And look at where it's at middle America Now it's a tragedy Now it's so sad to see An upper class city having this happening Then attack Eminem cause I rap this way But I'm glad cause they feed me the fuel That I need for the fire to burn and it's burnin' and I have returned And I am Whatever you say I am If I wasn't, then why would I say I am? In the papers, the news, everyday I am Radio won't even play my jam Cause I am Whatever you say I am If I wasn't, then why would I say I am? In the papers, the news, everyday I am I don't know it's just the way I am I'm so sick and tired of being admired That I wish that I would just die or get fired And drop from my label and stop with the fables I'm not gonna be able to top what my name is And pigeon holdin' to some poppy sensations They cop me rotation at Rock 'N' Roll stations And I just do not have the patience To deal with this cocky Caucasians Who think I'm some wigga who just tries to be black Cause I talk with an accent and grab on my balls So they always keep asking the same fucking questions What school did I go to? What hood I grew up in? The why? The who, what? When and where and the how? Till I'm grabbing my hair and I'm tearing it out You've been driving me crazy, I can't take it I'm racing, I'm pacing, I stand and I sit And I'm thankful for every fan that I get But I can't take a shit in the bathroom Without someone standing by it No I won't sign your autograph You can call me an asshole I'm glad cause And I am Whatever you say I am If I wasn't, then why would I say I am? In the papers, the news, everyday I am Radio won't even play my jam Cause I am Whatever you say I am If I wasn't, then why would I say I am? In the papers, the news, everyday I am I don't know it's just the way I am  "Hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die, life is a broken winged bird that cannot fly." | ||||
| WoundedAngel Absolutely spectacular, and 1337 as hell. | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 12:16 AM | | |||
| Psychopath Registered: Jan. 01 | "Kim" Aww look at daddy's baby girl That's daddy baby Little sleepy head Yesterday I changed your diaper Wiped you and powdered you. How did you get so big? Can't believe it now your two Baby you're so precious Daddy's so proud of you Sit down bitch If you move again I'll beat the shit out of you [Eminem](Eminem as Kim) (Okay) Don't make me wake this baby She don't need to see what I'm about to do Quit crying bitch, why do you always make me shout at you? How could you? Just leave me and love him out the blue Oh, what's a matter Kim? Am I too loud for you? Too bad bitch, your gonna finally hear me out this time At first, I'm like all right You wanna throw me out? That's fine! But not for him to take my place, are you out you're mind? This couch, this TV, this whole house is mine! How could you let him sleep in our bed? Look at Kim Look at your husband now! (No!) I said look at him! He ain't so hot now is he? Little punk! (Why are you doing this?) Shut the fuck up! (You're drunk! You're never going to get away at this!) You think I give a fuck! Come on we're going for a ride bitch (No!) Sit up front (Well I can't just leave Haley alone, what if she wakes up?) We'll be right back Well I will you'll be in the trunk 1 - So long, bitch you did me so wrong I don't wanna go on Living in this world without you Repeat 1 You really fucked me Kim You really did a number on me Never knew me cheating on you would come back to haunt me But we was kids then Kim, I was only 18 That was years ago I thought we wiped the slate clean That's fucked up! (I love you!) Oh God my brain is racing (I love you!) What are you doing? Change the station I hate this song! Does this look like a big joke? (No!) There's a four year old boy lyin' dead with a slit throat In your living room, ha-ha What you think I'm kiddin' you? You loved him didn't you? (No!) Bullshit you bitch don't fucking lie to me What the fuck's this guy's problem on the side of me? Fuck you asshole, yeah bite me Kim, KIM! Why don't you like me? You think I'm ugly don't you (It's not that!) No you think I'm ugly (Baby) Get the fuck away from me, don't touch me I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I SWEAR TO GOD I HATE YOU OH MY GOD I LOVE YOU How the fuck could you do this to me? (Sorry!) How the fuck could you do this to me? Repeat 1 (2x) Come on get out (I can't I'm scared) I said get out bitch! (Let go of my hair, please don't do this baby) (Please I love you, look we can just take Haley and leave) Fuck you, you did this to us You did it, it's your fault Oh my God I'm crackin' up Get a grip Marshall Hey remember the time we went to Brian's party? And you were like so drunk that you threw up all over Archie That was funny wasn't it? (Yes!) That was funny wasn't it? (Yes!) See it all makes sense, doesn't it? You and your husband have a fight One of you tries to grab a knife And during the struggle he accidentally gets his Adam's apple sliced (No!) And while this is goin' on His son just woke up and he just walks in She panics and he gets his throat cut (Oh my God!) So now they both dead and you slash your own throat So now it's double homicide and suicide with no note I should have known better when you started to act weird We could've...HEY! Where you going? Get back here! You can't run from me Kim It's just us, nobody else! You're only making this harder on yourself Ha! Ha! Got'cha! (Ahh!) Ha! Go ahead yell! Here I'll scream with you! AH SOMEBODY HELP! Don't you get it bitch, no one can hear you? Now shut the fuck up and get what's comin to you You were supposed to love me {*Kim choking*} NOW BLEED! BITCH BLEED! BLEED! BITCH BLEED! BLEED! Repeat 1 (2x)  | ||||
| Suzie I was supposed to have a status, but some FNMoron forgot what it was supposed to be. | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 9:28 AM | | |||
| Psychopath Registered: Aug. 00 | "Drug Ballad" [Eminem] Ayo...This is my love song...it goes like this [Eminem] Back when Mark Walhberg was Marky Mark This is how we used to make the party start We used to mix Hen' with Bacardi Dark And when it, kicks in you can hardly talk And by the, sixth gin you're gonna probably crawl And you'll be, sick then and you'll probably barf And my pre-diction is you're gonna probably fall Either somewhere in the lobby or the hallway wall And everything's spinning You're beginin' to think women are swimming in pink linen again in the sink Then in a couple of minutes that bottle of Guiness is finished You are now allowed to officially slap bitches You have the right to remain violent and start wilin' Start a fight with the same guy that was smart eyin' you Get in your car, start it, and start drivin' Over the island and cause a 42 car pile-up [Em's spaceman voice]Earth calling, pilot to co-pilot Look at the life on this planet, sir, no sign of it All I can see is a bunch of smoke flyin' And I'm so high that I might die if I go by it Let me out of this place I'm outta place I'm in outer space I've just vanished without a trace I'm going to a pretty place now where the flowers grow I'll be back in an hour or so Chorus [Eminem] 'Cause every time I go to try to leave Something keeps pullin' on my sleeve I don't wanna, but I gotta stay These drugs really got ahold of me 'Cause every time I try to tell them "no" They won't let me ever let them go I'm a sucka all I gotta say These drugs really got ahold of me [Eminem] In third grade, all I used to do Was sniff glue through a tube and play rubix cube 17 years later I'm as Rude as Jude Scheming on the first chick with the hugest boobs I've got no game And every face looks the same They've got no name So I don't need game to play I just say whatever I want to whoever I want Whenever I want, wherever I want, however I want However, I do show some respect to few As ecstacy got me standing next to you Getting sentimental as fuck spillin' guts to you We just met But I think I'm in love with you But you're on it too So you tell me you love me too Wake up in the morning like "yo, what the fuck we do?" I gotta go bitch You know I have stuff to do 'Cause if I get caught cheatin' then I'm stuck with you But in the long run These drugs are probably going to catch up sooner or later But fuck it, I'm on one So let's enjoy Let the X destroy your spinal cord So it's not a straight line no more 'Til we walk around looking like some wind-up dolls Shit's sticking out of our backs like a dinosaur Shit, six hits won't even get me high no more So bye for now I'm going to try to find some more Chorus [Eminem] That's the sound of a bottle when it's hollow When you swallow it all wollow and drown in your sorrow And tomorrow you're probably going to want to do it again What's a little spinal fluid between you and a friend? Screw it And what's a little bit of alcohol poisoning? And what's a little fight? Tomorrow you'll be boys again It's your life Live it however you wanna Marijuana is everywhere Where was you brought up? It don't matter as long as you get where you're going 'Cause none of the shit is going to mean shit where we're going They tell you to stop, but you just sit there ignoring Even though you wake up feeling like shit every morning But you're young You've got a lot of drugs to do Girls to screw Parties to crash Sucks to be you If I could take it all back now, I wouldn't I would have did more shit that people said that I shouldn't But I'm all grown up now and upgraded and graduated Did better drugs and updated But I've still got a lot of growing up to do I've still got a whole lot of throwing up to spew But when it's all said and done I'll be 40 Before I know it with a 40 on the porch telling stories With a bottle of Jack Two grandkids in my lap Babysiting for Haley while Haley's out getting smashed Chorus 2x (Same as previous, but 2nd time the last line is repeated like this) Drugs really got ahold of me They really got ahold of me 'Cause drugs really got ahold of me They really got ahold of me | ||||
| Q_instupid | posted on 06-25-2001 @ 1:20 PM | | |||
| Psychopath Registered: Jan. 01 | Here's some Old Skool... THE KIDS (Teacher Sings)And everyone should get along.. Ok children quiet down, quiet down Children i'd like to introduce your new substitute teacher for the day His name is Mr. Shady Children quite down please Brian don't throw that.. (SHUT UP!) Mr. Shady will be your new substitute while Mr. Kaniff is out with Pneumonia (HE'S GOT AIDS!)Good luck Mr. Shady... (Verse 1-Eminem) Hi there little boys and girls (FUCK YOU!) Today we're going to learn how to annoy some squirrels But first, i'd like you to meet my friend Bob (Huh?)Say Hi Bob, ("Hi Bob") Bob's 30 and still lives with his Mom and he don't got a job Cause Bob just sits at home and smokes pot With his 12 year old brother looks up to him off alot And Bob likes to hang out at the local waffle spot And wait in the parking lot for waitresses off the clock When it's late and alot gets dark and he fakes like he walks his dog He drag 'em in the woods and goes straight to the ????? And even if they escape and got the cops Ladies would be so afraid, they would drop the charge Till one night Miss. Stacey went off the job When she felt someone grab her whole face and said not to talk But Stacey knew it was Bob and said knock it off But Bob wouldn't knock it off cause he's crazy, and off his rocker Crazier than Slim Shady is off the locker You couldn't even take him to Dre's to get Bob a doctor He grabbed Stace by the legs, he chopped it off her And dropped her off in the lake for the cops to find her But ever since the day Stacey went off the wander They never found her, and Bob still hangs at the waffle diner And that's the story of Bob and his marijuana And what it might do to you So see if the squirrels wanderin, it's bad for you (Chorus) See children, drugs are bad And If you don't believe me, ask ya Dad And If you don't believe him, ask ya Mom She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time So kids say no to drugs So you don't act like everyone else does And there's really nothing else to say Drugs are just bad mmm k...(Verse 2-Eminem) My penis is the size of a peanut, Have you seen it? Fuck no you ain't seen it, it's the size of a peanut (Huh?) Speaking of peanuts, you know what else is bad for squirrels? Ecstasy is the worst drug in the world If someone offers it to you, don't do it Kids 2 hits'll probably drain all your spinal fluid Cause spinal fluid is vinal, you won't get it back So don't get attached, it'll attack every bone in ya back Meet Zack, 21 years old After hanging around with some friends at a Frat party He gets bold, and decides to try five, when he's bribed by five guys And peer pressure will win when everytime you try to fight it Suddenly, he starts to convulse And his pulse goes into hyperdrive, and his eyes go back in his skull His back starts ta...look like the McDonald's Arches He's on Donald's carpet, laying horizontal barfin' And everyone in the apartment starts laughin' at him "Hey Adam, Zack is a jackass, look at him" So they took it to, so they think it's funny So the laughin' does basically nothing Except maybe wastin' your money Meanwhile, Zack's in a coma, the action is over And his back and his shoulders, hunched up as if he was practicin' Yoga And that's the story of Zack, ecstasy maniac So don't even feed that to squirrels class, cause it's bad for you (Repeat chorus) (Verse 3-Eminem)Last but not least, One of the most humungous problems among young people today, is fungus It grows from cow manure, They pick it out, wipe it off, bag it up, and you put it right in ya mouth and chew it...Yum Yum Then you start to see some dumb stuff And everything slows down when you eat some, of um... And sometimes you see things that aren't there (Like what?) Like fat woman in g-strings with orange hair(Mr. Shady what's a g-string?) It's yarn Claire Women stick them up their behind, go out and wear 'em (Huh?) And if you swallow too much of the magic mushroom Whoops, did i say magic mushroom, i meant fungus Ya tongue gets all swolled up like a cow's tongue (How come?) Cause it comes from a cow's dump (Oh)See drugs are bad, it's a common fact But ya mom and dad know that's all i'm good at But don't be me, cause if ya grow up and ya go OD They're gonna come for me and i'mma have to grow a goatee And get a disguise and hide, cause it'll be my fault So don't do drugs, and do exactly as i don't, cause it's bad for you (Repeat chorus) (Teacher & Classmates)Come on children, clap along (SHUT UP!) Sing along children (SUCK MY MOTHERFUCKING DICK!) Drugs are just bad, drugs are just bad (South Park's GONNA SUE ME) So don't do drugs, tell 'em save more for me (GOD DAMNIT! MUSHROOMS KILLED KENNY)(Pltttt OOOO *fart noises*)la la la la!  Temptaui dure et tam longe adiui et in summo Etiam nihil est | ||||
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