08-26-2003, 10:15 PM
I don't have a lack of confidence.
It just ended because she is never happy. Nothing I ever did was good enough, and she found fault with anything I did do.
When she was happy it was great, but that just rarely happened. I'm a very easy-going, laid back person and she can be the exact same. However, she's been surrounded by so many horrible relationships and divorces in her life that she gets very high-strung and nit-picky about relationships. In every other facet of her life, she's not a nag, a whiner, a pessimist, etc. When it comes to relationships, she's insane and she knows it.
So, I kept holding out hope that eventually she would get over her hangups, that I'm not going to hurt her, cheat on her, etc...but it just never happened. Everytime things were going great, she would focus in on one minor thing, blow into a giant ordeal, then be in a pissy mood for three weeks until we broke up. Then she'd want to get back together and the cycle would continue.
Now, it's over and I'm moving and now she's at the beginning of another cycle where she misses me and wants to start hanging out again. If I stayed, it would go back to being horrible after a bit. It's very easy for her to just quit on relationships
So I am moving, I am moving on. I will be banging other girls if they let me. I am not moping around waiting for this girl. I'm not still carrying a torch. Sure I want to bang her, but she's amazing in bed, she's got a sexy-as-hell body, and her vagina squirts.
If she wants to take the risk eventually and move down to New York to be with me, then that would be great, as it would be a sign that she's the one making the move, it would be harder for her to quit on us, and it would be a sign of committment which she has never been able to make.
However, I'm not holding my breathe. I don't think it will happen, and will immediately be looking for someone(s) new when I get to the city.
That being said. I gave her a free pass after the concert. She was sober, wanted to cheat on her boyfriend, and I turned her down because I knew it was the right thing to do. That's her only free pass. She offers it up again, I will close the deal. Too bad if it ruins thing with the guy she's living with. I'm not going to turn it down twice. I'm just not going to pursue her.
And it wasn't even my birthday yesterday.
It just ended because she is never happy. Nothing I ever did was good enough, and she found fault with anything I did do.
When she was happy it was great, but that just rarely happened. I'm a very easy-going, laid back person and she can be the exact same. However, she's been surrounded by so many horrible relationships and divorces in her life that she gets very high-strung and nit-picky about relationships. In every other facet of her life, she's not a nag, a whiner, a pessimist, etc. When it comes to relationships, she's insane and she knows it.
So, I kept holding out hope that eventually she would get over her hangups, that I'm not going to hurt her, cheat on her, etc...but it just never happened. Everytime things were going great, she would focus in on one minor thing, blow into a giant ordeal, then be in a pissy mood for three weeks until we broke up. Then she'd want to get back together and the cycle would continue.
Now, it's over and I'm moving and now she's at the beginning of another cycle where she misses me and wants to start hanging out again. If I stayed, it would go back to being horrible after a bit. It's very easy for her to just quit on relationships
So I am moving, I am moving on. I will be banging other girls if they let me. I am not moping around waiting for this girl. I'm not still carrying a torch. Sure I want to bang her, but she's amazing in bed, she's got a sexy-as-hell body, and her vagina squirts.
If she wants to take the risk eventually and move down to New York to be with me, then that would be great, as it would be a sign that she's the one making the move, it would be harder for her to quit on us, and it would be a sign of committment which she has never been able to make.
However, I'm not holding my breathe. I don't think it will happen, and will immediately be looking for someone(s) new when I get to the city.
That being said. I gave her a free pass after the concert. She was sober, wanted to cheat on her boyfriend, and I turned her down because I knew it was the right thing to do. That's her only free pass. She offers it up again, I will close the deal. Too bad if it ruins thing with the guy she's living with. I'm not going to turn it down twice. I'm just not going to pursue her.
And it wasn't even my birthday yesterday.